Tag: homeless

ODS

Last night at the Open Door Shelter was one of these, which brought joy and endless satisfaction. When I arrived, two of the residents told me right away that they wanted to cook with me and asked how they could help. Luckily, this time there were several dishes that could be started at the same time, so there were four of us standing around the table and doing something, and three more just standing by and chatting. And one girl said: you know, it reminds me how it was at home when we were all cooking together! And I told her that that’s exactly how it felt for me!

Another girl asked me whether I minded making a TikTok video of us cooking, and I said I do not mind at all, and we had fun filming different stages of the process.

The staff joined us; there were many simple steps that I could delegate to any of the interested parties. It was great to see how in contrast to previous times, most of the youth hurried to package and put away the remaining unused ingredients and clean the cooking surfaces. I almost lost hope I would ever see such an attitude again!

And everybody liked what we made! No, we didn’t sit for a meal together; this is still months apart, even if things will keep going the way they are going now. But we talked! We talked while cooking, and we talked after. I had some really deep and thoughtful conversations, and I hope to keep developing these relationships.

Before I left, I checked how many meatballs were left – not more than a third of what we made, and most of the mashed potatoes were gone, too. I like when people like what I cook!

A girl who already finished eating asked another one, who just started: do you like it? And after hearing “yes,” continued: then say thank you! The second girl looked embarrassed: she didn’t even think about that option 🙂

I left reluctantly at 8 PM, and we made plans for my next visit, and we also decided to try to go to the movies in the park after the holiday.

… and I know very well that one good day does not really mean that everything will be good next time, but I still feel like “the day is not wasted.”

The Night Ministry

Two weeks ago, a couple of days before my upcoming volunteering at the youth shelter, I emailed our volunteer coordinator to check what we were going to do. He replied to me that the shelter and the Night Ministry, in general, were so understaffed that he is working extra shifts at other places, and he couldn’t be there for my volunteering.

That was a very disturbing turn of events, and I started thinking about what I could do to help. I almost felt that donating money makes more sense now than trying to do any volunteering.

Then, last week, it was Lighting Up The Night, the most important fundraising event of the year:

For this event, I was not a sponsor – invited (plus a guest) as a volunteer, which, having all the unfolding situation, felt weird. However, I still wanted to go because I wanted to see people and talk to them. This event is the only opportunity for me to catch up with staff and volunteers from other locations.

I took my mom as my guest so that she would have a chance to see something different (she used to come to the volunteering events with me before the pandemic, and some Night Ministry staff still remembers her).

Overall, the outcome of the evening was positive: I had a chance to speak with many of the staff and the Night Ministry Vice President. The problem with the staff is not the lack of funds, but the lack of people, especially people who would be willing to work with the youth, do the night shifts, etc. And that’s indeed a huge problem, and I have no idea how to help. The staff from the youth shelter told me that I could come even when our coordinator is not there, that they know me, they miss my cooking, and they would help with buying the ingredients. So this should be counted as positive news, even if it does not improve the situation with the staff shortage.

I left the event with one of the flower arrangements from the tables (and I loved it :))

Yesterday, I saw a picture of me in the newsletter:

It almost made me sad, because I think I am doing so little now, and so-so-much-more is needed…

CTA Accident

Just found out that I didn’t publish this post on Sunday when I wrote it (and was wondering why everybody reacted to my lost nail, and nobody reacted on this one). Anyway, publishing it now.

Today, we went to the matinee performance of West Side Story in the Lyric Opera. “Us” included me, my mom, and my neighbor. I chose a matinee performance for this show a long time ago because I thought that that was the show that my mom would enjoy.

She did; she liked it to the extent that she didn’t make any negative comments. But I wanted to share something else about this outing.

Most of the time, I try to take Uber when I take mom out; however, the last couple of days were impossible with all the road construction and Taylor Swift concerts, so after consulting with my neighbor, I decided that we would take the Red line and then a bus to Lyric opera. 

We started way in advance, and the train was on time. However, as it often happens on the Red line, a person asking for “some change” appeared. I give to people on the streets most time, but I never give on the CTA, because that’s a violation, and there are many other places where people can ask for money.

I ignored the requests. Requests turned into hysterical crying (Anybody! Anybody! Any change!!!) Since this is not an unusual scene, and since I had mom with me, I didn’t pay much attention to the development of the event, and the next thing I realized (after the fact) was that this woman tried to commit suicide and managed to almost completely open the doors while the train was running.

The CTA crew stopped the train, then they came and escorted this woman to the front of the train and called for police assistance. We were very close to Sheridan station, but we could not move until the train crew received confirmation that the police arrived and were ready to take this person into custody.

We sat there for 25 minutes with the train engine off (and consequently the A/C off). I was afraid that we would be late (my neighbor was waiting for us by the Lyric entrance), but also, this whole situation was so horrible and hopeless…

Volunteering And Near-Hostage Situation

Yesterday, I was volunteering in the youth shelter and experienced a situation that had never happened in all seven years of my volunteering. The boyfriend of one of the residents of the transitional living program (that’s not the program I volunteer for, but in the same building) can to the entrance threatening residents with a knife. 

I should mention that the day before, I emailed our volunteer coordinator with a concern that I had a very low engagement level with the residents recently. During these past seven years, I experienced all sorts of dynamics. There would be days when the engagement would be low, especially when there were many new people, but the current situation went on for a very long time without signs of improvement. Throughout all these years, I came and cooked together with the residents. Even if their participation was limited, we had a chance to chat and develop relationships. Recently, it was not that some days were worse than others, but it was constantly not working: I asked our coordinator whether he had any suggestions for improving the situation. We agreed to have a brainstorming session, but not on that day – the residents would go to the trampoline park after dinner.

I should also mention that an assistant coordinator scheduled a “build your taco” dinner. I have complicated relationships with Mexican cuisine and know nothing about making tacos.

It all started like any other dinner recently: only one person was interested in making tacos with me. One staff member added spices to my skillet, where I cooked the ground beef. A couple of other residents approached the kitchen and assembled their tacos, I was about to call it yet another failure, and then that happened. 

There was some motion, and I heard people asking why they couldn’t go to the second floor, and nobody was leaving for the trampoline park as planned. And then I learned about the guy with the knife and that we all have to stay inside and not go anywhere, including me!

The situation remained quite tense for the next hour. Police was called, they came (not very fast), and searched this guy, but didn’t find a weapon (as many commented, most likely, he threw the knife into the bushes by the church, but nobody searched there). Then he walked away, and I had hoped I could leave, but he reappeared (we watched the surveillance camera footage). 

In the end, the volunteer coordinator walked me out of the building using one of the emergency exits (it was another challenge for me to find my way :)), and it was scary because he tried one exit and didn’t feel it was far enough/secure enough. 

But – we had a terrific bonding time! More residents came to make tacos, and people tried their favorite spices, and I told them I loved theirs’ better, which was true. We talked and talked and shared who we are and where we are from and planned three more activities!

So it looks like it just took a near-hostage situation to resolve our participation and communication issues!

The Night Ministry Helping Homeless on CTA

WBEZ article

Volunteering

This week is all about volunteering, and overall it is one of these weeks which are “overloaded” with different activities.

Tuesday was an ODS day. I didn’t go there for six weeks (not because I didn’t want to, but because our volunteer coordinator was unavailable). As usual, when I am away for a long, and when lots of residents leave and lots of new ones come, it is challenging to start developing new relationships again.

Besides, I was asked to make a salmon soup, and I accidentally burned the leek, and there was no extra. I had to substitute with onions, but that’s an unacceptable substitute, so the soup didn’t come out as good as it should. I need to come and make it one more time soon!

Today, The Night Ministry had a career workshop so residents from different programs could prepare for the career fair for next week.

It was organized exceptionally well, and I was happy to tell the staff how awesome it was. It was the first time The Night Ministry had such kind of an event, so after the youth left, we talked a little bit about how it could be improved even more.

All is great, but I am really tired, and tomorrow, I am going to the Planned Parenthood fundraising, and of Friday, I have friend’s birthday.

At work, two projects are finally moving, and also, I started my Advanced Postgres series for my co-workers, and also, there are two million little things related to the conference.

So it feels like I am busy 24X7,and still have too little done!


Doing Things With ODS

I ended up doing things with the youth from the shelter for two days in a row. Yesterday, we went to Christkindlemarket together, and today we went to the Steppenwolf Theater to see the world premiere of the play The Bald Sisters.

Yesterday was great! It was probably the same thing as with skating, which is that people didn’t quite figure yet that Christmas is already here. There were almost no lines for food and drinks, and you could get close to all the booths and see everything very clearly.

It was 55F outside, and it could not be a better time to wonder around. We drank hot chocolate, and gazed at all pretty ornaments,

Continue reading “Doing Things With ODS” →

The Art Institute And Gelato

It was more for today’s day! After all of the morning /afternoon activities in Palatine, I returned to the city and met the youth from the shelter in the Art Institute.

We were there a month ago, and although some of the youth appeared interested, the field trip was pretty chaotic. I was unsure how things would turn up this time, but to my surprise, seven of the youth showed up, including a couple of folks who were there on our previous Art Institute outing. Another surprising thing was that everybody was very engaged, and we stayed in the museum until it was about to close. I had to answer the same questions they usually ask in Medieval art: where are people of color? And as usual, they shake their heads in disbelief when I tell them that people lived in one town or village throughout their entire lives, and they didn’t know: you mean, they didn’t know there were other places? They thought that people everywhere were like them? 

After the Art Institute, I took everybody to the new gelato place. Some people started to walk forward, and our volunteer coordinator told those still there that I was taking them for gelato. 

— What is gelato?

— It’s a kind of ice cream.

— Ice cream?! Hey, stoop! STOOOP! She is taking us for ice cream!!!! 

We got to the gelato place. When the youth realized they could try multiple flavors, one of the girls asked: can I try all of them?!

The staff of the gelato shop was super-patient, and when the youth got all the flavors they wanted, there was peace, quiet and eternal happiness. 

The South Side

“Do you like the Soth Side?” a young woman in the youth shelter asked me. We talked about her home; she said she is from St. Louis and wants to return there. “What about Chicago?” I asked her. 

– Chicago is my second best. The South Side

-Which places do you like on the South Side?

-It’s not places; I like being there. I like how I feel. It gives me good vibes. People are friendly, and I feel good when I walk there and people say Hi. 

-I like how you said it! It’s very important to feel good vibes!

And then she asked: Do you like South Side? 

She asked with hope in her voice, and I avoided the answer. 

I do not know it enough, although Igor took me to tour the South Side landmarks on multiple occasions. It is a foreign land for me; even though people are indeed nice and friendly, I do not belong there. And this young woman is blissfully ignorant of that. 

I don’t know what to make out of that except for acknowledging the fact..

Thoughts About Volunteering

These days, similar to when Donald Trump was elected, many new volunteer applications are coming in. I know it won’t last long, and we will struggle to fill the shifts again in several months.

Most people who want to volunteer their time to protect abortion rights are people who want to give and who do not expect to be showered with praise for doing it.

However, I still come across volunteers who … I struggle to describe what bothers me; I observed similar behavior before and can’t really put a right world on it. For example, after hearing me talking about MAC hosting, one lady started asking me “whether I ever had any negative experience with clients.” I wanted to tell her that, at the moment, there is a six-month waiting list for MAC volunteers, so she should not bother, but I decided against it.  

I met a couple of other new escorts (I do not want to profile them, though I desperately want :)) who also behaved like their presence there is the best gift; and now it’s OK to sit in a folding chair for most of the shift and talk on the phone and do nothing just when our shifts are becoming more and more stressful. I blogged about similar encounters in the youth shelter before, so that’s no news. It stinks that you can’t filter out such people before they start volunteering. Time is spent training and onboarding them, and other people are waiting, and such volunteers are of no use. 

I also remember how once, when I was blogging in my Russian blog about the youth shelter, some people reacted to my stories as “these youth are ungrateful, demanding, make you feel guilty” and other nonsense of the same kind.

To summarize: people are right when they say that volunteering is rewarding. But it is rewarding not because others say “thank you,” but because you are giving whatever you can to other people or a good cause. Volunteering is a privilege. And even though you try your best to give, nobody is obligated to accept. Giving is rewarding, not hearing “thank you” in return (although it’s always nice to hear :)).