Category: everyday life

Three Weeks In September

The first three weeks of not working were complicated. Somehow, I felt both relieved and super-stressed at the same time. I reminded myself that for weeks prior to my termination, I thought about stopping working immediately pretty much all the time, and I knew I was happy not to be there anymore. And at the same time, I felt so stressed that some nights I could barely sleep.

In situations like that, I try to identify exactly what worries me and address that concern first. I knew I had enough money to retire; we discussed it with my wealth manager, and I knew 1.5 years earlier wouldn’t make a dramatic difference. One thing was healthcare. I hadn’t planned to retire before I became Medicare-eligible, and now I faced almost a year with no coverage. I felt a little bit better when I realized that even if I had self-pay COBRA for all that time, it would still be manageable because I have no dependents, and that calmed me down for a while. Then I talked to my wealth manager, and he confirmed again that I can retire in January if I want. His calculations on how much I will be able to spend each month sounded very conservative to me, but his plan was for me to leave a fortune after I pass away, which was not in my plans, so I figured that if I do not plan to leave 2 M behind, I can spend pretty much the same as I do now.

Another thing was the void of “doing nothing.” Once again, in the weeks before that, I told myself and others I had so much to do, and the thing I wanted to do least was work, so I wanted to stop working. I knew I wanted to work part-time anyway, so I started working part-time for my good friend and peer, to whom I promised a long time ago I’d do some consulting when I retired. However, onboarding with his client took forever, and I realized I missed the drama of crisis resolution.

At the same time, several other things were developing. Shortly before I left my previous job, three different people reached out to me with some potential job opportunities, and all three were interesting in some way, so I started talking to them, still not being 100% sure whether I wanted to go full-time.

One of these opportunities didn’t work right away; the other two were going, and I strongly felt about one of these two. During the interviews, I felt that that was the right match, and I thought that if this company would make me an offer, I would accept. Then, to my complete disappointment, they said they were going with someone else, but they were planning to open another position soon. At that point, I decided to reveal my availability on LinkedIn. I was still unsure, but I thought that possibly someone I knew would have an interesting project I could do part-time. I made a post as broad as possible, and I can tell right away I didn’t like what followed.

Checking In :)

For the benefit of my friends who follow my life trajectory on this blog – this conference is busier than anything I had before!

I hardly wrote a line in the past two days, and even when I get to the hotel room, I have to send a whole bunch of not-exactly-personal emails, mostly related to PG DATA and my meetups.

Well… I have a long flight back on Sunday!

Are You Doing SQL?

The weirdest and funniest thing happened to me in Chicago last week.

I was waiting for a Red Line train at Roosevelt when I saw, out of the corner of my eye, a very queer person coming down. Queerness isn’t unusual, of course, but this particular outfit was not exactly for the weather (I would question a bare chest at 67 F outside, but whatever). He sat down on a bench to wait for a train, and suddenly, he addressed me: “Excuse me, are you doing SQL?”

I am used to people noticing my laptop on the CTA, and even recognizing me, but my laptop was inside my backpack. I nervously looked down at my clothes, but I didn’t even wear a Postgres hoodie or anything with Blue Elephant on it. Finally, I replied, “What exactly do you mean?”

— You are running this SQL thing on Wednesdays, don’t you?

— Yes, I am! But how do you know? I do not have anything that says “Postgres” on me.

— I’ve been to your events a couple of times. I remember you; it just took me some time to place you.

We talked a little bit about my meetup and others. I am so embarrassed that I do not remember people (and yes, he didn’t come to our meetups in a pink tutu, but still). As it turns out, I don’t even remember many people I briefly communicated with at my former firm. When they reach out on LinkedIn and say we talked, I often can’t recall either the conversation or the person, and I feel horrible about it. And no, that’s not the “I am way too popular” thing; it’s just something I need to work on.

Last Week: Things Are Moving Fast

How can I be so busy when I do not even have a full-time job? It’s a mystery, but that’s what is happening!

A quick week’s recap.

Monday – the Neighbor Night at the Chicago Architectural Center:

Tuesday:

Morning biking, intense conference prep, and PG DATA org committee meeting:

Wednesday:

Checking out a second Amorino location (it’s in the Rookery Building, beautiful, cozy, no lines! Loved it!) Joint meetup with the Chicago Ruby User Group, went great!

Thursday:

Clinic escort in the morning and CSO concert in the evening (Klaus Makela one more time).

Friday:

Multiple meetings on different topics, frantic packing until the time I had to leave for the airport, and a cherry on top: I forgot my passport and had to return home from Belmont! At that point, I had no choice but to get an Uber, which I try to avoid unless there is absolutely no other option, but there was no other option. And I spent more time in the security line than getting to the airport!

Completely random photos from my neighborhood:

Jarvis Square is ready for Halloween
Seeing on the Red Line

Any Time Of Year, Chicago Is The Best!

My former colleague was visiting my former firm this week, and since we have always been not just colleagues, but rather friends and collaborators, we met on Sunday and spent several hours walking and talking. Chicago was at its best, and I used this opportunity to show more hidden treasures :).

When we first discussed our plans for that day, he suggested biking, but I knew that what we wanted/needed most was talking, and it’s better to talk when you are walking 🙂

From Lea cafe where we had lunch, we walked to the Millennium park and crossed over the BP Bridge to the Maggie Daley Park, and then to the Lake Front Trail, and then we walked to the start of the Riveewalk, and headed West. We stopped for a Fannie May gelato at the cornder of E. Wacker Drive and Michigan Avenue, and then continued to the Bridges Museum, one of my favorite hidden treasures of the city. Then I showed the Vietnam War Memorial, the Eastlander Disaster site, and then we crossed the river and headed to the Magnificent Mile, and ended the day at the Starbucks Reserve Roastery. Talking non-stop for five-and-a-half hours. I was surprised to realize I barely took any pictures 🙂

Mindfulness In Nature

I just realized I haven’t posted in several days. These days were packed with events, and I wrote at least ten blog posts in my mind :), so now I will try to bring them to life.

On Saturday, I participated in the outdoor meditation session “Mindfulness in Nature.” I’ve done it several times before, and I enjoy this activity. When I was going down the stairs on the way to our meeting place, I saw the most beautiful spider web with a perfect spider in the center:

It was an absolutely perfect autumn day, but it was also surprisingly “not yet an autumn day,” not only because it was warm, but also because all the trees were still green, and it didn’t smell like fall at all. On the way there, I thought that the best things in my life happened in fall, and that I always anticipated good things happening during this season. At the beginning of the session, when we were asked about our word for nature, I said: the gift.

We typically go on the same nature walk at each session, and I was surprised by how much our small nature area didn’t look like fall this time. All late summer flowers were still blooming, and there were tons of bees everywhere! It didn’t look like the world was ready to hybernate!

As always, I am sad that I am leaving an a couple of days and will miss the rest of it!

Biking In The Morning Fog

Mom’s Updates

At the beginning of September, I made another attempt to file for my mom’s SSI. Last time, we were told we could try again in July 2026, but July and August were two super-stressful months, plus my mom’s internet saga, plus fixing here access to the Social Security portal.

Finally, we scheduled the phone appointment, and miraculously, the same inspector who was handling our case two years ago was assigned to us again. I almost cried when I heard her name! Because she was already completely aware of our situation, everything went fast and smoothly, and a week later, my mom was granted SSI. Less than I hoped, but still something. Her housing situation didn’t improve; I tried writing to our Alderwoman, but they told me they can’t help. I am going to file for cash assistance from the State (we couldn’t do this until we had a decision on her SSI).

My mom didn’t understand what had happened and kept asking whether it meant that they would take her “food card” away, so I assured her that it was in addition, not instead, but I do not think she believed me. Her first payment should come on September 30, and I hope that all will be well!

Morning Biking

You never know how long you will be able to keep biking in the morning, but so far – let each of these mornings be blessed!

Here, a rising sun reflects in the building’s class windows on Lakeshore Drive, while the (almost) full moon is still visible. The sun is rising behind me.

COBRA, And What To Do About It

Before my separation from my previous firm, I had only one experience with COBRA, and I didn’t like it, however, similar to last time, this time I didn’t have other options: I was terminated without any notice and didn’t have any upcoming employment. That being said, the fact that my previous firm was going to pay my COBRA for the first four months was a relief.

Everything looked easy because I just needed to go to the COBRA provider website and enroll. I enrolled, but the website didn’t know anything about my former employer paying for my COBRA, and nothing changed several days later. I emailed my former HR, but nobody replied. A couple of days later, I received a note in the mail saying that because nobody paid the COBRA premium, my coverage couldn’t be reinstated.

I emailed my former HR again, and they said that they just paid, and everything should be fine. I logged in to my COBRA provider website, and it indeed indicated that the payments were made. However, the Blue Cross website was still insisting that my insurance was terminated.

On top of that, I actually needed to go to the doctor because my back/left leg started to hurt, and by September 17, it hurt really badly, so I couldn’t stand or walk without the pain. A strong painkiller I had for situations like that didn’t help, and in general, I felt the pain was more severe than previous relapses.

No appointments were available with my primary, and they suggested I go to another office to see another doctor in the same network. Then the scheduling center couldn’t find my insurance, as expected, and my assurances that COBRA would apply retroactively didn’t work. I told them that I would self-pay, got an appointment, paid $145, got another painkiller prescription, an X-ray referral, and a referral to an ortho specialist. A half-hour later, the scheduling service told me they couldn’t send a referral because my coverage wasn’t reinstated, and they told me to call when it was.

I returned home, took a deep breath, and called PT Solutions, which is a Haven on Earth and where Cori does his magic. I asked whether there could be any time that afternoon Cori could see me, and they found a slot. I came in and explained all about COBRA and being in between, and they were genuinely sorry and asked whether it was OK to charge me $35 (do not ask! I do not understand how they can charge a co-pay without insurance, but I am telling you, it’s a Heaven on Earth right here, in Rogers Park!). And Cori examined me and told me that there is no new injury; it’s all in my back, which reacted to the stress in such a way. He made some manipulations and showed me some exercises, and told me to come back on Monday if it didn’t help.

I have been doing all these exercises at least twice a day every day, and although I am not completely out of it, things have definitely improved.

I spent the next two days calling the COBRA provider (who said everything was OK and that they would notify Blue Cross, and insurance would be retroactively applied) and calling Blue Cross, who said they received nothing. On Wednesday, a Blue Cross representative called me and asked me to call COBRA again because he had already called them multiple times and verified the email address where they should have sent a notification, and it’s still not coming.

Finally, on Thursday morning, I logged into my Blue Cross account and didn’t see the red note on it. I couldn’t believe it was over, so I called them to verify, and they confirmed. However, I still had to ask them to reprocess a dental claim from September 2 (they won’t do it automatically), and I also have to file a claim for my out-of-pocket manually…

Summary:

  • Why there are so many parasites around healthcare?!
  • The rest of the world is normal in comparison to us
  • There are some angels around us, especially in Rogers Park

And almost forgot: after I made sure that my insurance was reinstated, I immediately signed up for COVID and Flu shots, and got both of them today, so now I am ready to travel!