Tag: family

Things I am Losing And Forgetting

I know that I am balancing on the edge when I start forgetting important things or losing object which are in plain sight. Just two minutes ago, I realized that I didn’t hit “post” on my repost, and didn’t repost here about yesterday’s meetup. And you what – yesterday was amazing! I felt good, like I hadn’t for a very long time! Moving to a new location was all I wanted, plus more!

However, the past week was marked by multiple micro-tragedies. On Saturday, Anna, Kira, and I stopped at the Art Institute before going to the concert, with the background idea of leaving their backpacks at the coat check for the duration of the concert. The idea was great, but closer to the end of the concert, I realized that I couldn’t find the tag, although I was sure I had put it into my backpack pocket. I ended up asking Anna to go to retrieve her luggage, and I found the tag in that very pocket on Sunday evening!

Second. I was cleaning the milk wand on my cappuccino maker, and then… I could tell where I put it! I am absolutely sure I accidentally threw it into the garbage, but I know how small, relatively heavy objects slide to the bottom of the bag almost instantaneously, so I didn’t have high expectations! Since I already had a thought about replacing this machine (I bought it because it cost $35, and I decided I could throw away that much for experimenting). The machine was not perfect, and I was leisurely thinking about the alternatives.

I checked on the manufacturer’s website and found that they do not have spare parts and that they are about to discontinue this particular model. Then, I went to check what’s on sale on Amazon, selected the device I liked, and it was shipped to me the day after. However, I was unable to make it work, and trust me, I am not a complete idiot. Something was definitely broken. I spent 30 min on AWS tech support, and they agreed to send me a replacement (I still had to sign up on the manufacturer’s website to initiate a replacement, but still!). Waiting for it to be over!

And finally, today, when I was at the ODS making Chicken Alfredo, I heated the pan too much before putting the chicken breasts on it, and hot olive oil made a little explosion straight into my right palm! I am still in pain, but not super severe.

What’s wrong with me?!

Mother’s Day Weekend

When I stopped at my mom’s place on Monday, I knew she was going to tell me everything that was wrong the day before, and I braced myself for a half-hour torture. Fortunately, it turned out not to be “everything bad,” but just the resentment that we didn’t talk solemnly about both Anna and me (and I’d say, she is probably the major reason why we didn’t talk about us :)). Nothing is new; unfortunately, the (formal) words mean to her more than anything else, so I expected that reaction.

As for me, it was probably the best Mother’s Day I’ve had! We started Saturday with the CSO Family matinee,

Then we went to the Buckingham fountain to “Switch on Summer.” For several years, I wanted the girls to have this experience, and finally, Kira had a chance to be there (Nadia was busy with her extracurriculars, and she and John arrived later on Saturday).

Kira was really helpful all the time, not just “I want to help!” but actually helping to set up the table, clean up, and just “keeping me company” when I was doing things in the kitchen. The latter one seriously felt great. I always lament that this apartment isn’t designed for cooking as a family activity: the kitchen is separated from the rest of the apartment, and when I am cooking, I am cutting off all personal interactions. It’s nice when someone keeps you company!

Later, Anna helped me to fasten all loose screws in my flower baskets, and we installed them on the balcony railing, and then she went to visit my mom, for which I can’t thank her enough.

I was hoping that we would be able to squeeze in some biking, and it turned out that Anna had similar ideas, and even more, she was ready to go early in the morning, so that we could see sunrise over the lake. And she actually woke up at five, and we went together and had an amazing time. We went further away than we originally planned, and I started to worry that the girls would resume their previous day’s fighting while we were away, but fortunately, only Kira was up, so she didn’t have anybody to fight with 🙂

Anna ordered food from the Honeybear Cafe, picked it up, then picked up my mom, and we all sat for our late breakfast/brunch; Igor joined us a little bit later.

I also put out the Mother’s Day pastry boxes from Vanille.

I was glad that Igor, Anna, and I had a rare opportunity to sit together and talk about things we were all interested in without major interruptions :).

And finally, we all went to the Windy City Garden Center to pick up flowers for my balcony. That’s one of the few things I can’t manage with Uber, so picking up flowers was a great Mother’s Day present. I thought that after they leave, I would start planting, and I was wondering how long it would take, but the girls offered to help, and they were seriously helpful; to my surprise, we were done in less than an hour!

I will definitely need to buy some extra plants, because it’s difficult to estimate precisely how many will be needed, but the bulk of the work is done!

A final Mother’s Day touch at the courtyard!
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CSO Concerts

Last week, I attended two CSO concerts again:). On Thursday, I went with my neighbor to the concert featuring mezzo-soprano Joyce DiDonato, who is currently the CSO artist-in -residence. I like mezzo-sopranos more than I like sopranos, and I really enjoyed her voice!

After her performance of Neruda songs, the orchestra played Walton’s 1st symphony. My neighbor, who watched a thousand times more movies than I and is very well versed in the history of American filmmaking, had heard many of his works before, and I didn’t even know his name! I think I will be forever discovering authors, artists and musician that “everyone knows,” but I am totally fine with it :).

I am a little bit embarrased to say that I paid attention to Joyce DiDonato’s appearance, especially because I was just ranting about my mom’s obsession of how the performers look, but I am still going to mention it. I figured she should be about my age, and I later checked that she was 57. She does not make attempts to hide her age, and she puts on the reading glasses when she performs, but she also wore an absolutely stanning black dress with giant golden leaves on the front, with opened back and closed neck. I do not know why I find it important to share my feelings; it was somehow empowering and reassureing: yes, wareing extravagant dresses at this age is OK; and not going for a plastic surgery or botox is OK as well.

Saturday was the day of a Family matinee at the CSO. Both Nadia and Kira were spposed to go, but Nadia had a soccer practice and a swimming lesson, so it was Anna, Kira and I. It was Mother Goose and a Cabinet of Wonders show starring Natalie Merchant. She was dancing in the asles, and the kids were taking off their seats and following her along:). It was almost a mess, but a very exciting one! Probably the best family matinee so far!

***

Yesterday, I stopped by my mom’s to tell you about my second cousin’s death. I sort of expected the reaction that followed, but still, given how she always tells us how nervous she gets when she doesn’t hear from someone and how we should keep her informed, it’s a bit inconsistent.

She made sure she understood me correctly, asking me to repeat who died. I told her that yes, David Raskin had passed away, and we were not informed. She said: Well, Alla (his widow) could have sent me an email! I told her that Alla was found unconscious on the floor and was taken to a hospital, to a cardio clinic, and she didn’t even ask how Alla was. Neither did she ask when exactly David passed away, nor what the cause of death was. She was just very sad, he was the last relative, but oh well, what happened can’t be changed. Now, can you look at this message on my phone?

The situation in Russia is pretty hopeless because there are people whose only goal is to find out how each situation could benefit them, and they do not care about other people, other people’s feelings, preserving memories, or pretty much anything except their own gains. The only thing I was able to negotiate was “putting aside papers that look old.” I will try to put together a list of things that I want to keep, if possible, but I have no idea whether I will be able to take anything away.

Sunday

There was one more CSO concert on Sunday, the one where I took my mom. I used to purchase a separate matinee subscription for her, but I know that no matter what she says, it is becoming difficult for her to attend the events often. Besides, to be completely honest, going with her is not more entertainment for me, but a difficult job.

She used to enjoy the music, but now she always says that she was looking at the musician’s hands rather than listening, and I feel a little bit resentful spending money on the tickets when she is not really engaging in the show. That would be OK, as long as she’s saying she enjoys time with me, but also, she keeps saying unpleasant things about everyone: a conductor, musicians, patrons, and staff. She recognizes many musicians, and she has some opinions on their character, which I have no idea how she got. Most frequently it’s “he always thinks too high of himself, he likes to show off: look at me, I am so great!” I think that most likely it’s because when she sees people on the stage smiling, she does not understand why 🤷🏻‍♀️. She also comments on everyone clothing, body sizes, hairstyles, etc, and always asks “what is the nationality of this artist,” and get upset when I tell her I have no idea.

The concert was very good, and I hoped that the program which contained several smaller pieces will be better for her to stay focused. Unfortunatley, the seats I got where on the side, rather than in the center, so she had trouble capturing the sound, and also she could not see the musicians hands, so she didn’t like it that much. She could see the conductor, which partially compensated for the rest 🙂 .

Nadia And Kira In Chicago

On Friday, I left work earlier to take a train to Milwaukee to pick up Nadia and Kira. I planned to work on the train and at Anna’s house so that I wouldn’t miss more work, but when I walked out of the office and looked at my phone, I saw the email notifying me about the death of my second cousin, and then I had to make calls, send emails, and just process what had happened. And then I had to switch gears completely and be present for the girls.

It was a very good visit. I am glad that I left early and we could take Borealis back; this way, the girls were not super tired when we arrived home, and there were no unnecessary fights.

We had ice cream before bed, breakfast sandwiches in the morning, and then went to the CSO for Kids concert. This time, it was “The Bremen Town Musicians.” I hope that they record these kids’ shows, where the 45 minutes are packed with classical pieces in an amazingly dense manner. The music from the recording below is played in the beginning of each concert, and after a couple of repetitions, the kids know it by heart.

Anna arrived and met us after the concert. We went to Lea Cafe for lunch (I am so glad everyone likes it the way I do!).

Then we headed back to Rogers Park. The girls and I went straight to the beach, and Anna went to my mom’s house, and then they met us there.

Going to the beach playground was a great idea! The girls took all the sand toys from my house and built sand castles.

Being by the lake felt so good, and it felt like summer would actually happen (you might start to doubt the latter one!). Nadia went close to the water almost immediately and stayed there looking at the horizon. Then both of the girls took their boots off and said that they wanted to feel the sand with their feet. It was far from being warm on Saturday, and I could not imagine how one could feel “good” being barefoot in this weather, but they apparently enjoyed it!

That was the highligh of my weekend, the rest was my endless community work and coming to terms with a loss.

***

My second cousin, my only relative who was still in Russia and with whom I communicated on a regular basis, passed away.

I was not notified until the day he was cremated, but it is what it is, and I can’t change it. But besides that, this whole situation is one big horror story. I do not have the mental energy to talk about details, but I will post more soon. It’s just something that appeared out of nowhere and altered my trajectory, and even though I already learned that there is nothing I can do (interfere in the current situation, where I have tons of concerns), I am still having a hard time accepting “nothing I can do.”

Good Friday In Milwaukee

We colored two dozen eggs, ate tons of Finnish and Estonian chocolate, and Anna and I spent more than three hours talking non-stop (and found an amazing coffee place!)

Vlad In Chicago

Vlad made a surprise visit to Chicago, and immediately, Illinois and all neighboring states knew! My weekend ended up being completely upside down, but it also presented an opportunity to take a picture with all my children, which hadn’t happened for more than two years.

Vlad was doing a pop up in the Lilac Tiger bar:

I asked Vlad to make minis for me, so that I could try more than one 🙂

Also, I asked him to visit my mom, which he did on Saturday. I went there with him because, at this point, my mom needed an interpreter. We had not more than twenty minutes one-on-one, but overall, visiting my mom with Vlad, and coming to his event today, significantly altered my plans, and I have no idea how and when I will catch up with the rest of my life. And no, I am not complaining 🙂

Pottery Class

I gave a Pottery Class Christmas gift to Nadia and Kira, but Kira got sick the morning of the day I was going to pick both of them up in Milwaukee. After discussion with Anna, we decided that I will still take Nadia for that class, and figure out something else for Kira.

Looks like it was for the better, since the class turned out to be way more advanced than advertised. Although no previous experience was needed, there were a lot of instructions, which Kira probably wouldn’t like :).

Nadia and I had a great time, though!


Nadia’s bowl
My orchid pot

After the class, we went to Ryo Sushi, then to Amorino gelato, and spent some time at the Art Institute Ryan Center on some crafts. As Nadia put it, “it gives her an inspiration.”

Time well spent :). Also, Nadia made a Valentine for me: