My Russian Passport

Another Russia-related Kafkian story. I knew my Russian passport was to expire in 2024, but in January, June seemed far away, and then life happened. Three or four weeks ago (not like life stopped happening, but I suddenly remembered that I was about to create a huge problem) I realized that I needed to apply for a new passport immediately: if I did not have a new passport before the old one expires, I would have to go through the “citizenship verification process.” That could take several months, and only then could I apply for a passport.

I went to the Russian Consulate in New York website and filled in the application. Then I needed to make an in-person appointment (they are not accepting applications by mail.) I started to look for an available slot, and it turned out that the first available was in mid-August. I took it, but I knew this was two months after my passport expiration, so I also signed up for a queue to receive the offers for the spots that could be released and offered to people in the queue.

Now, check out what were the conditions to stay in this queue:

• Each time they send you a slot, you have to accept or reject it within 24 hours, otherwise they kick you out of the queue
• On the other hand, if you login to the portal more than twice a day, they disable your access because “you might be a bot” and require you to reset your password, and you have to wait for an hour before you will be allowed to reset it
• After you reject, the next offer comes almost instantaneously, and if you reject it, you are out of the queue
• And all of the appointments that were offered to me were after my August appointment!

Although I tried very hard, it was impossible for me to keep monitoring all of these conditions while doing my day job and the conference, so eventually, I was kicked out. Not knowing what to do, I emailed the Consulate, asking them what I could do and what would happen if I did not get an appointment before my passport expired.

To my surprise, they replied in a couple of hours with the following: Right now, there are several openings on the following days (days listed). Do not get into a queue; go to the portal and reserve your spot. I did as they said and booked an appointment for May 2. I hope that it will go well, although there is a whole bunch of things I need to prepare, including cash for the services (they are not allowed to use banking systems at the moment) and a stamped return envelope. But at least I have an appointment!

P.S. If anybody wonders why on Earth I need a Russian passport, here is why. 1) Even if I choose to denounce my Russian citizenship, I have to have a current passport; otherwise, I can’t legally do this. 2) I do not want to pay the Russian government the fees that I have to pay for citizenship 3) If I don’t have a passport and don’t properly denounce the citizenship, I can’t get a visa to Russia either.

To be continued.