Tag: ods

And A Very Different Dinner

The last time I was at ODS, I spoke with one of the staff, N, who always supports my efforts to make a difference and loves my cooking, especially baked salmon. We agreed to try to make a baked salmon dinner when I am back from the conference. Although I am “not supposed” to communicate with staff directly, with the absence of a coordinator, it was my only option.

Everything worked great, and it turned out that no matter how infrequently I come to the ODS these days, everyone remembers baked salmon :). All ingredients were purchased, except that I asked to buy eight lemons, and there were only two (although big ones :))

In addition to making baked salmon and mashed potatoes (which are also an all-time hit), I brought half of the apple cake, which I baked on Sunday, and the amount of praise and the number of “thank you”-s was way above average.

That’s all I need. I am happy that I made other people happy 🙂 and received so much good vibes!

ODS

Yesterday, I was going to make dinner at the ODS, but then it turned out that the current volunteer coordinator had put in their notice, and forgot or didn’t have time to purchase supplies for making dinner. I went to the shelter anyway, picked up some sweets from Vanille, and spent two hours in conversations with staff and residents. There were too many private moments in these conversations, so I am not sharing them except for one thing: I was thinking about taking a break from volunteering for the Night Ministry, but I am not going to do it.

Even though I am not there often enough, I still can do something good. And a little bit is better than nothing.

Yesterday was a very emotional and a very long day, and the whole week seems to be long and emotional. The fear of the National Guard’s appearance dominates the environment and touches my life in many different ways. Between escorting, which I did twice this week, ODS volunteering, and conference attendees coming from abroad, and all the conversations I have with people, it’s almost too much.

However, I have a hope (maybe too soon) that Chicago’s readiness to fight back stopped the worst that could happen. We’ll have to see, but I really hope…

ODS

As I keep saying, there are more misses than hits with ODS dinners, but it was really good today. First, I met a resident who had been there for a while, and we had several in-depth conversations over the past few months. Also, I know that these conversations are important for him, and even if it’s a small part of his life, it’s a positive part :).

There were just a few people when I arrived, so at first I thought that we would have to make pizzas only with the staff helping me, but then the residents started to appear, and a couple of late arrivals expressed interest in making their own pizza. I started the oven again, and helped with the process, and it was a very good new connection.

The kids in the shelter continue to surprise me. It so often happens that some of the residents have previous experience in catering or hospitality, and often are more comfortable cooking for a large number of people than I am. Today, one of the boys told me that he worked in the pizzeria before, and I could tell by watching his professional pizza slicing. I ended up asking for his recommendations on how long to keep pizza in the oven (the ODS oven functionality has always been imperfect, to put it mildly).

Gingerbread Houses With ODS

I did Gingerbread houses with my kids when they were kids, many once or twice, and I thought I was not into it. But when a staff member in the West Town Shelter suggested that I do this with the youth in ODS, I felt I should give it a try. She suggested we do it together with another volunteer. That volunteer spent a lot of time asking me whether I knew she was a jew and had nothing to do with Gingerbread houses, and I thought this whole thing was not going to work.

I purchased four houses, and I thought that there would be at max one or two residents interested and that we would end up doing houses by ourselves, but in fact, I regretted I only got four – we could use at least six if not eight, and the residents’ creativity and patience were astonishing.

ODS

As I already said multiple times, things have not been working with ODS recently, and I had so many last-minute cancellations that I almost lost hope that something would ever happen. In October, the volunteer coordinator and I made another attempt to schedule things, and I sent to her a list of dates when I could come. Then there were no communications for three weeks, so the day before I was supposed to come I emailed her again asking to confirm that we were still on.

There was no response to my email. I had the cell number of the previous coordinator, but I couldn’t find the new coordinator’s phone. At some point, I had a crazy thought that I should just go there, but having what I have in my life these days, I thought I would be devastated to lose another two hours for nothing, and after some hesitations, I left home.

I was already walking home from the train station when I saw a text on my phone with a contact “maybe <her name>” (which meant that she mentioned her number in one of her emails). The message read: When are you planning to arrive?

We had a rather dramatic exchange of texts, and I frantically checked spam and trash, but there was no email found. We immediately agreed to communicate through texts in the future and agreed for me to come a week later. I felt horrible because I thought that it was all my fault, and if I was really committed to coming to the ODS, I should have either tried to find her cell number or gone to the ODS without confirmation. I felt that I was so sure (subconsciously) that it wouldn’t work again, that I was expecting this arrangement to fail. I am not sure whether I’ve explained it thoroughly, but I tried :).

Nevertheless, we agreed on November 14. I had an event I wanted to attend on that day (the Beat meeting), but I decided I had to break the curse of ODS events not happening. I confirmed on Wednesday evening by text, and then on Thursday there was another text: “There are going to be 2-4 people, how about we switch to dessert or just hanging out?”

I replied that it was OK and that I would pick desserts from Vanille. So, finally, I made it to ODS. The staff was amazing, everybody loved Vanille pastries (and it ended up being way more than four people in!). Usually, I do not like to hang out just for the sake of hanging out, but as it turned out, the youth wanted just to hang out and talk, and we all had a great time.

Now, I am very cautious, and I am not saying that it’s a success, because the last several months were very unpredictable. But one thing for sure – I do not want to give up on the Night Ministry.

Things Are Working When People Are

Today, after a very long break, I went to the Art Institute with the youth from the shelter. C. tried very hard to make things happen that time, but in the end, the only reason everything worked was the staff, who suddenly became available and ready to drive the youth to the museum. I just started to describe what was going wrong and how there was no way it could work, but then I deleted two paragraphs because, in the end, the important part was that there were three really engaged residents and the amazing staff, and everything worked perfectly!

For all of the youth, it was their first visit to the Art Institute, and they were overwhelmed with the options. They wanted to stop by each object on their way and read everything about it. As always, there were remarkable observations and unexpected questions. As always, there was a stop at Amorino after the museum was closed. As (almost) always, the youth thanked me for the outing. One of the youth was especially thankful and said: Sorry, I am not really cultural, I do not know anything about art and I didn’t know what I would like, but I liked everything!

And here is very tired and very happy I.

ODS

A brief summary of my most recent ODS activity.

  • First time after a long period of absence, everything went great; everybody participated in making pizza, I had great conversations, I clicked with several young people in the shelter, and everything was great.
  • The second time, two weeks later: way less engagement; only two girls came to help me cook. The girl who was the most enthusiastic about my presence and promised to connect to me on LinkedIn and tell me everything about her progress sat in the corner with her back facing me, and when I approached her, she replied: yes, I am coming in a minute, but she kept staring at her phone screen.
  • Third time: we tried to go to the Art Institute. We talked about it when I cooked dinner, and there was a lot of interest. However, on “day X” nobody wanted to come
  • Forth time, today: almost no participation. The staff came to help me cook. One girl reluctantly approached but then walked away. I asked her later whether she liked the food -she did and she thanked me.

I talked to the staff. They agreed with my assessment that it’s hard to predict, and only the time can tell and only the time can improve. I will keep coming, and I need to find a way to do it ore frequently.

ODS – Starting A New One More Time

When I met with my friend N. on Sunday, we talked about ODS, and I shared that I am unsure about how to continue, when everybody is new and we do not have a volunteer coordinator. I told her that I was going to go there on March 5 for the first time after a long break and that I hoped that something positive would come out of it. I scheduled my volunteering for that day although Boris as going to be in town, but he said he completely understood it, and as long as something positive can come out of it, it will be all good.

It ended up being a really great and meaningful event. I came in, and approached a group of residents asking who would’ve like to make pizza with me, and two young women immediately volunteered (I later learned that they were close friends and roommates). We immediately clicked and started chatting, and later, one young man joined us, and then one of the staff, and when I already turned the oven off, yet another young man. I stayed there until past 8 PM (and I had to take Uber home). These first two young women told me they are going to start a community college to become nurses, and how they are going to do it together and support each other. One of the residents asked me why did I come to the US, and since it was the next day after the Elpha post went up, I just showed it to her. This opened yet another conversation. It is not always easy to let the residents know that I feel for them, because there were times when I had very little money, and that for the longest time, I didn’t have a home of my own.

It all went so well, that I examined my upcoming schedule one more time and found one more day when I would be able to come. Next day, we messaged back and forth with the new volunteer coordinator, and agreed that we could try other days od the week, and we could even try to go to the Art Institute in April. Fingers crossed 🙂

ODS

Last night at the Open Door Shelter was one of these, which brought joy and endless satisfaction. When I arrived, two of the residents told me right away that they wanted to cook with me and asked how they could help. Luckily, this time there were several dishes that could be started at the same time, so there were four of us standing around the table and doing something, and three more just standing by and chatting. And one girl said: you know, it reminds me how it was at home when we were all cooking together! And I told her that that’s exactly how it felt for me!

Another girl asked me whether I minded making a TikTok video of us cooking, and I said I do not mind at all, and we had fun filming different stages of the process.

The staff joined us; there were many simple steps that I could delegate to any of the interested parties. It was great to see how in contrast to previous times, most of the youth hurried to package and put away the remaining unused ingredients and clean the cooking surfaces. I almost lost hope I would ever see such an attitude again!

And everybody liked what we made! No, we didn’t sit for a meal together; this is still months apart, even if things will keep going the way they are going now. But we talked! We talked while cooking, and we talked after. I had some really deep and thoughtful conversations, and I hope to keep developing these relationships.

Before I left, I checked how many meatballs were left – not more than a third of what we made, and most of the mashed potatoes were gone, too. I like when people like what I cook!

A girl who already finished eating asked another one, who just started: do you like it? And after hearing “yes,” continued: then say thank you! The second girl looked embarrassed: she didn’t even think about that option 🙂

I left reluctantly at 8 PM, and we made plans for my next visit, and we also decided to try to go to the movies in the park after the holiday.

… and I know very well that one good day does not really mean that everything will be good next time, but I still feel like “the day is not wasted.”

The Night Ministry

Two weeks ago, a couple of days before my upcoming volunteering at the youth shelter, I emailed our volunteer coordinator to check what we were going to do. He replied to me that the shelter and the Night Ministry, in general, were so understaffed that he is working extra shifts at other places, and he couldn’t be there for my volunteering.

That was a very disturbing turn of events, and I started thinking about what I could do to help. I almost felt that donating money makes more sense now than trying to do any volunteering.

Then, last week, it was Lighting Up The Night, the most important fundraising event of the year:

For this event, I was not a sponsor – invited (plus a guest) as a volunteer, which, having all the unfolding situation, felt weird. However, I still wanted to go because I wanted to see people and talk to them. This event is the only opportunity for me to catch up with staff and volunteers from other locations.

I took my mom as my guest so that she would have a chance to see something different (she used to come to the volunteering events with me before the pandemic, and some Night Ministry staff still remembers her).

Overall, the outcome of the evening was positive: I had a chance to speak with many of the staff and the Night Ministry Vice President. The problem with the staff is not the lack of funds, but the lack of people, especially people who would be willing to work with the youth, do the night shifts, etc. And that’s indeed a huge problem, and I have no idea how to help. The staff from the youth shelter told me that I could come even when our coordinator is not there, that they know me, they miss my cooking, and they would help with buying the ingredients. So this should be counted as positive news, even if it does not improve the situation with the staff shortage.

I left the event with one of the flower arrangements from the tables (and I loved it :))

Yesterday, I saw a picture of me in the newsletter:

It almost made me sad, because I think I am doing so little now, and so-so-much-more is needed…