Tag: family

While I Was Away

My mom has this idea “not to bother/upset me when I am traveling,” which creates all sorts of problems. I am always prepared for some surprises upon arrival, and this time I just could read between the lines that something had happened at the end of the week. Weighting on all my options (see the previous post), I decided to make an effort and stop by her on the night when I arrived. Fortunately, our flight arrived on time, even a little bit earlier, and also, there was no wait at passport control and at the luggage carousel.

I called her at about 6-45 and told her I would stop by. After a relatively long discussion about her phone and how she couldn’t reach her Russian bank, I told her that Boris would look at her phone when he would come. Then I looked at the text messages on her Russian phone and realized that her scheduled payments were already restored (there was a message about the successful payment processing). Then I showed her a message I received about the plumbing inspection, and she said that “actually, the shower switch was not working.” I tried to ask her why she didn’t ask Igor to call the management company or the handyman who gave her his number, and she replied something like “Igor has a long commute to his office.”

But that was not it. After we discussed all of the above (and remember, it was evening when I flew in), she told me that when she went for a walk on Friday, “something happened.” She was talking to a person she sometimes meets when walking, and it looked like she fainted. Thee happened to be a Russian-speaking person nearby (a caregiver of one old lady), who lifted her up, and called the personnel on the beach. My mom didn’t call Igor, and she didn’t tell him, so now we have no way to tell what exactly happened. All I am describing is “maybe- possibly.”

The paramedics put her in the wheelchair, which she was trying to resist (thank goodness they didn’t call mental services!). They took a blood test and EKG, presumably nothing dangerous because, in the end, they let her go). I was mad and scared, and I yelled at her (I hate to do this, but otherwise, she does not understand the severity of the problem).

I need to come up with the questionnaire to make sure we can figure out what she is trying to hide because otherwise, she “does not want to bother me” and does not want to tell Igor, and this all might end up badly.

Helsinki Day 6

On Saturday morning, Anna biked to our place, and we had a two-and-a-half-hours bike ride all over Helsinki. Both Anna and I were tired, but Boris wanted to show us all the best places, so it took a while 🙂

Anna was filming the whole route with her 360 camera, but for now, I only have a couple of pictures:

By the time we were done with this ride, and Boris and I parked our bikes, it was almost eleven, which meant that the ice cream place by the Sibelius monument was about to open!

In the afternoon, Nadia and I went clothes shopping; that was the birthday activity I promised to her many months ago. We also picked up several outfits for Kira and some Moomin toys for both of them. And in the evening, the four of us went to the concert at the Church in the Rock. We sat in the very front row, as close to the musicians as none of us ever sat, and listened to this truly amazing concert!

Day 5 – Tallinn

On Friday, we went to Tallinn. That was the only part of my June trip that I posted a lot about, so I do not have much to add.

The journey was smooth. The children’s playroom on board was great. In the city, Boris adapted the route so that Kira could do a lot on her own. We ended up not climbing any of the towers (and we will have to return to do that!). Girls had tons of fun in the Marzipan museum making their own marzipan figurines and painting them.

Also, the Maritime Museum was open, and since it was rainy in the morning, we spent almost two hours there. What I didn’t notice before was that they had models for kids to play on each of the floors, which made it especially entertaining.

Anna and I on the ferry
Continue reading “Day 5 – Tallinn” →

Helsinki Day 2

Boris and I had an early morning bike ride, and I was shocked by how empty the streets were in the morning. Even at 6-30, there were almost no cars and no bikers or people. That was a great ride, and I was thankful for Boris because it’s not his favorite time of the day to bike 🙂

Unfortunately, the rest of the day didn’t go like the day before – it was raining on and off, often heavily. we still decided to go to Suomenlinna, which was probably not the best decision we could make :), but what’s done is done.

No good pictures because of that, but a couple of them taken by Anna earlier – on the plane and on the first day:

Helsinki Day 1

We successfully resolved the puzzle of not matching the numbers of people and bicycles and ended up with everybody having the appropriate means of transportation :).

The morning started with a grey sky and rain, but later, it became nice and sunny, so we were able to go ahead with our original plans. Oodi is an amazing place, and we spent the first half of the day there. Then, we went to pick up a bike for John and a bike seat for Kira, and then there was more biking, and a playground by the library, and more biking and more walking.

We had ice cream, and then Nadia’s ice cream was lost to the seagulls, and we got another one for her and guarded it from the audacious birds. The rain started only about 8 PM when everybody was in their respective homes. With the forecast how it is for this week, every day without the rain is a blessing!

Lots of berries. Lots of yogurts. Lots of ice cream.

In Helsinki – Finally!

We made it! Everybody had their passports, the plane was on time, the luggage was not lost, and Anna’s family was settled in their AirB&B.

Anna is going to use my old bike, and Nadia got a new one; both of them will be donated after this trip, but they will serve us well for now.:)

Mom’s Updates

Last Friday, I tried to initiate two processes: issuing Mom’s US passport and updating her Social Security information so that she could receive a new card and apply for benefits. I knew that we needed to present the original of her Citizenship certificate. Still, unfortunately, I completely forgot that when you apply for a US passport for the first time, you must mail the original certificate.

So, although the SS office has the information that mom’s status changed, they can’t update the documentation before her certificate is returned. On the one hand, I regret that I didn’t think about it in advance. On the other hand, last Friday afternoon was the only time I could address some of these urgent things, and I took the last slot for the passport appointment. If I would skip the passport, the next time I could take my mom there would be in mid-August, and her desire to be able to travel is strong, although entirely irrational. So I didn’t have much choice.

Also, I am not sure I would have time to go to the next round of appointments with her if we had the SS information updates. So let’s say that everything happens for a reason.

The Russian bank saga continues. After I yelled at my mom that she had to call the Russian bank (and Boris transferred money to her phone), she pulled herself together and did call (although she called from Skype, thereby, she could not be identified by the phone number). They took down her information, but she didn’t know her secret word, and they told her she needed to come in person (!!!).

Fortunately, a good friend of mine has the authorization to perform everything that can be done with Mom’s accounts and receive her new bank cards. She went to the bank branch today, but the results were mixed. Although it is clear that there were no fraudulent actions, they refused to unblock this card and insisted it has to be reissued. The online access is still blocked even though they said they unblocked it.

My friend is going to the bank branch again tomorrow, so help her God!

One More Crayziness

A couple of weeks ago, my mom told me that her Russian phone was sending her messages that there were not enough funds on the card which was used for phone payments. It was indeed not enough because five years ago, I added her Visa, which was issued by a Russian bank but was in US dollars. She used this card to pay for all he necessities, and I periodically transferred her pension to this Debit Visa, converting from rubles to dollars. After the war began and my mom couldn’t use this card anymore, it sort of became useless, but I forgot to switch her phone payment method to her ruble card.

Now, these dollars were finally gone. I tried to login to her phone account page multiple times, but the page was hanging and never came back. Then, as much as I hated it, I tried to login to her bank and transfer some money to this visa. Although I’ve done it many times before, this time transaction was declined, and the automated message said that somebody would call her (mom) from the bank within the next hour or so. Good luck with that.

When I tied to login a day later, the bank page said that her online account it locked, and in order to unlock it, she needed either to come in person or call the number listed (in Moscow). I knew that she had to call from her cell phone; otherwise, they won’t believe that she was she. But her phone… you got the picture.

Boris told me that he would try to transfer money from his Russian bank to my mom’s phone, and then we will figure out what to do next. I still thought there is no emergency because all her payments for her Russian apartment were scheduled as auto-pays. However, today they sent her a message that her automated payments are stopped because her card is blocked! So now it’s not just her online access but everything. What she still has to pay are the property taxes and utility fees (so that the heating and electricity won’t be shut down completely). So now that’s one more thing I need to resolve.

In The Courthouse

More about the oath ceremony. It turned out I completely forgot what my oath ceremony looked like. I found my notes from 2008, and I realized that to the smallest detail, including the super-long wait, it was exactly like it was with my mom. Also, back then, I had mixed feelings about this second citizenship.

It’s funny how the human brain works. I remember that after the initial shock from coming to live in a completely new country which was nothing like other places I had visited before had passed, I liked it being here. When I figured out how to perform the daily tasks, and it stopped being a “coming home with a newborn” struggle, I instantly felt at home. However, at the same time, I also felt uneasy about “denouncing previous allegiances” and referred to my new status as “a marriage of convenience.”

My “growing into” American citizenship was a long process, and now when I read my notes from that time, it surprises me how selective our brains are.

Back to yesterday’s ceremony. In the notice that was sent to my mom, the ceremony start time was indicated as 12-30 PM, and I planned to be there with mom by 12-15. Anna took an earlier train to be there for sure, not the last minute, and we met my mom at Lake Red Line CTA and walked to the Federal Court.

There was already a long line on the 25th floor, and when we reached the beginning of the line, a lady told us that Anna and I should leave and come back at 1 PM. It was all very confusing because it sounded like we couldn’t be present during the ceremony, but as we found out when we came back, the actual ceremony was going to be at 1:30 PM. That meant that Anna had to sprint to the Union Station immediately after the oath.

All the rest went well. The judge who was conducting the ceremony said that ninety-six people from thirty-six countries were becoming US citizens on that day. He said that each person brings their own culture and experience and that that’s the nature of the country, and that fact that his ancestors came to America in the 17th century does not make his citizenship any “better” than other people’s citizenships. I think I was giving more thought to this ceremony yesterday than I did during my oath ceremony.

As I already mentioned, fifteen years ago, I didn’t like the idea of exclusiveness, of demands to denounce all my previous allegiances. To be honest, I do not know how I would feel about it now if the country where I was born wouldn’t expose the worst of herself. I do not know how Ukrainians who took the oath on the same day felt (I know there were some), especially because, as far as I know, Ukraine does not allow dual citizenship.

Mom received her certificate. Anna had to run to get back home (and hit all possible public transportation disasters on the way). Igor could not come because, somehow, he managed to get COVID over the weekend. So it was just my mom and me, and while we were inside, another spell of pouring rain started. Fortunately, it didn’t last long, and when it slowed down, we walked to Amarino and had coffee and ice cream there. The rain started again, a stopped again, and again we had just enough time to walk to the nearest Red Line station.

Mom was very happy, and she thanked me multiple times for making this happen.

…. only when we got on the train I realized that I had left my jacket at the Courthouse (I thought that it might be too air-conditioned, and took a black jacket with me, but it was not cold, and…) I decided that it’s a good opportunity to shop for a new one 🙂

Mom Took The Citizenship Oath

It’s all done. This huge weight is off my shoulders. Now I am going to take a deep breath and dive into the next round of bureaucracy: Medicare, SS benefits, passport, and whatever else. But at least we are done with that one!