On family history, parenting, education, social issues and more
Author: Hettie D.
My name is Henrietta (Hettie) Dombrovskaya. I was born in Saint-Petersburg, Russian (actually, back then – Leningrad, USSR) in 1963, and immigrated to the United States in 1996.
I love Saint Petersburg, the city I was born and raised in, and I think it’s one of the most beautiful places in the world. Similarly (but differently) I love Chicago, and can’t imagine myself moving somewhere else in the observable future.
I have three children, Igor, Vlad and Anna, all adults living on their own, and one (so far) granddaughter Nadia. I also believe that my children are the best thing that happened in my life.
As for my professional life, I am working in the field of Information Technologies. When I was twenty, I’ve declared that the databases are the coolest thing invented and that I want to do them for the rest of my life. Thirty plus years later, I still believe it’s true, and still, believe that the databases are the best. These two statements together imply that I think a person can have it all, and indeed, I think so! Keep reading my journals to find out how I did it.
I planned to see the city lights in Hlesinki and hopefully to skate. The latter didn’t happen, because of 1) long lines 2) Boris does not skate 3) I decided I do not want to spend time on the solo activity plus 20 min wait. But we walked around quite a bit. Here are some pictures:
Several small videos of the moving figurines in the Stockmann windows
That’s the first time tried to embed instagram posts in my WP post. I like the fact this way you can use the errors and scroll through multiple photos. Let me know whether you like this idea!
Since my friend, N. told me that she chooses to spend the holidays not with her family but with people who would be alone otherwise, I was thinking about it. And the more I think, the more I realize, how right is it. A couple of days before my departure to Helsinki I stopped by my neighbor Renate to drop off a box of my cookies and to wish her a Merry Christmas. It turned out that our other neighbor was visiting at the same time, so instead of leaving immediately, I sat down and chatted for a little bit. I told them about our family travel plans and how we all are in different places. And then I mentioned this idea about spending the holidays with somebody how can’t spend them with the family or does not have one.
And then, all of a sudden, both my neighbors started to recall similar stories. Renate mentioned her son in law spending Christmas by covering the night shift in the PAWS homeless shelter. Then my other neighbor recalled her time being a nurse and covering the Christmas shift as well, and then Renate told us that she did the same while working on reception in the senior home.
Both of them were saying how good it feels and how happy and grateful the people were. It looks like it is not so uncommon not to be with your family for Christmas, and it’s surprising people do not talk about it that much.
Next time, when I will have the circumstances similar to what I had this year, I think I know what I am going to do :).
One of the craziest things I ever did – the flights both way with two connections, more time in the air than in Helsinki. But if I am supposed to be not just a godmother for Sonia, but a Fairy Godmother for the whole family, I have to measure to these standards!
It was a while ago when Igor introduced me to the Indiana Dunes, and since then we are trying to visit it at least once each summer. These trips are very special to both of us, which is why Igor bought this Christmas ornament for me. He bought it in summer 2018, managing to hide it from me on our way back to Chicago, delivering it safely to his home, and then five months later – to Anna’s home where we all celebrated Christmas.
This ornament made in from Indiana to Illinois, from Ilinois to Wisconsin, from Wisconsin back to Illinois – and then I dropped it on the floor in my house, and it broke! Can you imagine how I felt? I suppose you can!
I told Igor we will fix it, I promise. So in summer 2019, when we were at the Indiana Dunes, we went to the same store and asked them whether they still have these ornaments, and they did! I purchased one because it was the thought that was important, and made sure to deliver it home safely, and now it takes it’s happy place o the tree!
This week, presents started to arrive, and thus the second best part of Christmas has started! One of my most favorite moments is always the arrival of the parcel from New Zealand. Because… well, because it is New Zealand!!!
My friend made this neckless for me, with a coffee cup charm. And she and the girls baked some cookies:
Knowing that I was born in January 1963, you might think that my first Christmas was on December 25, 1963. But in fact, my first Christmas happened only in 1996, keep reading to find out why – this is going to be the longest post you ever read in my journal.
Before the October revolution of 1917, Orthodox Christianity was an official religion of the Russian Empire. The Julian Calendar which is two weeks behind the Gregorian Calendar, was used both in Church and in civic life.
After the revolution, the Church was separated from the state. Several months later, by a decree of the Revolutionary government, the country was switched to the Gregorian calendar. Christmas was denounced, along with all religious holidays, and Christmas trees were forbidden. That situation lasted until early 1930 were when the government decided to allow some of the fun to come back. Granted, there should not be any mention of Jesus. All the festivities were reassigned to the New Year celebrations. There was no more Christmas tree; it became a New Year Tree. The Bethlehem star on top became the Red Star. The Grandfather Frost remained more or less the same:).
Last Tuesday, we had a cookie decorating night in the Open Door Shelter. I brought in some cookies which we left undecorated on Sunday (when we ran out of decorating ideas), and also some dough to cut and bake.
That was the third time I organized the cookie decorating in ODS, and it was the best time ever. The youth got so engaged – the staff decided not to pull them out for other activities. Everybody did phenomenally. Some kids were saying they are not good with arts, but I replied with my usual “this is not a test.” At some point, the staff joined us in the kitchen, and I asked – would you like to cut the cookies? And they did and also decorated some.
I am inserting several pictures with their work in progress and the finished cookies. I was amazed both by their creativity and delivery:) I told them they are invited to my house next Christmas to help me decorate 🙂
I still have several minor Christmas to-dos: a couple of people will stop by my house for cookies pickup, I still need to wrap two presents which will be delivered after Christmas, and I still didn’t pack for my holiday adventure. Nevertheless – today is a quiet evening, and I feel very satisfied with what I’ve done this season.
All the things I’ve done are the ones I love to do, things which are an integrala part of my Christmas, and which I do not want to do in a hurry or just for the sake of them being checked. There are two charities which I am doing every year for the holidays: the Secret Santa for Chicago public schools and “Adopt a family” at the Palatine township.
Secret Santa I am participating is probably much like any other Secret Santa project in the US; it’s just that I know people and have seen all their activities expanding. I am doing it for nine or ten years. For the first several years, they also asked us to write the kids the letters from Santa. From myself and Anna, it was the most enjoyable part, but I guess not all of the donors were up to that, so later we were only asked to buy the gifts.
There are always some interesting letters. Once a boy asked for the real dinosaurs, and we bought him a dinosaurs book and a toy dinosaur, and write a letter from Santa asking to practice the dinosaur care first. I remember how I cried when a girl from the family shelter asked for “a bag to carry my stuff around.” I remember the thank you letters, where the kids would write that they had “the best Christmas ever.”
For this program, the donors are limited by $35-$40 per child; all presents are opened in the classrooms, and the program coordinators are trying to avoid comparison. It becomes a challenging task, especially when the kids also ask for clothing, but I learned to be creative and to shop for good prices.
This yeat, one of the letters read: I want this and that, and actually, I want a real puppy, but I know Santa you can’t get it for me, so a toy puppy on the leash will do!
I like that this program starts very early in the season, and you can shop avoiding the crowd. But this year, this same fact presented an extra challenge for me: I had to shop for the presents before the conference and the training. But in the end, I was able to put some thoughts into it, and package everything nicely, and deliver to the only gift collecting points in the Loop.
As for “Adopt a Family,” I did it the first time in 2000 when I felt that so many people helped me, that I need to give back. It turned out it was too early. Having to buy presents for one more family in addition to mine, spending $75 for each family member was over my budget. I returned to this program several years later, and my kids took the most active part in our gift giving. Maybe, next Christmas I will share some of our old stories, but now I just wanted to say that this program is equally important to me. It allows me to give back to my community, which helped me a lot when I first came to Palatine.
This year, as always, I discussed all the gifts with Anna, and they arrived on time and were ready for delivery. For several years now, the program asks for the gift cards for adults in the family, “to purchase food and necessities,” and I always feel sad that I am not allowed to add anything personal for adults. I would love to add it 🙂
This is an official name of this recipe from Betty Crocker, and the recipe is indeed mind-blowing in terms of how much chocolate you need! Each time when I am preparing to make a double, I am surprised yet another time :).
Since we live in Grandfather Google times and can always ask him, I will spare you from yet another copy of the same recipe. Instead, I will post a couple of pictures my friend Lena made in process of the cookies creation.