Tag: work-life balance

Thursday, Friday And Going To Vienna

Thursday and Friday were super-hectic because my time-sensitive project at work re-emerged with almost the same deadline, but now with me traveling. In addition, I needed to significantly modify both of my PGConf.dev submissions. I submitted everything more than two weeks ago, because I didn’t want to submit at the last minute, and I had to do it anyway, with the submission deadline being the EOD Friday.

With all of the above, I had very little sleep since Wednesday. Even though the show on Wednesday ended early, I couldn’t go to bed because I saw a new conference sponsor sign up, so I had to respond immediately and send a contract to sign.  For some reason, I could not fall asleep for a while after that, and this pattern has been going on since then. Usually, I can fall asleep immediately when my head hits a pillow, and that’s one of the reasons a short sleep is enough for me. Something got broken, and even though I was very tired, I couldn’t fall asleep, and since Wednesday, my sleep pattern is completely messed up, so my goal for the next several days is to get it back on track.

Since I was packing for my trip in a half-sleep mode, I was sure I had forgotten something. One thing I realized on Thursday evening was that I couldn’t find my new good presenter, and it was already too late to order a new one. Boris said he will lend me one of his, but I know it won’t be as good as the one I had, and I can’t figure out why mine was missing.

What appeared to be more critical was that it wasn’t until I arrived in Helsinki last night that I realized that I hadn’t pack any extra jeans. I am not sure how this happened, but now it’s a problem – we left for Vienna early in the morning, and we will come back late on Tuesday evening, so no shopping till Wednesday sometime. Unfortunately, airport duty-free shops have only super-fashionable jeans, and I do not like the wide-leg look that is now popular. And I do not want to spend time shopping in Vienna – we have better things to do!

To finish on a positive note, one of my Thursday accomplishments was moving the box with all cookie-related items back to storage. This box is huge and so heavy that I dreaded taking it down and putting it up on the top shelf, and I still do not know how I managed to do it, but I did!

2025. Part 1

2025 was a difficult year, though which year isn’t? I had been through many fights and won many battles, but a significant portion of those victories were Pyrrhic, so by the end of the year, I was not sure whether I had achieved anything. Still, I wanted to write a short summary of what I consider the wins of 2025 (and what’s not), and how I am going to build on them. I plan to have it in three separate parts.

Money

It starts with money, because if you do not have enough of it, nothing else can happen. Everyone who knows me believes my money management is perfect; however, the only reason it appears that way is that I plan with large margins. Last year, I realized that although I was not overspending (not spending more than I make), my budget became rather mythical, and that I lost a clear distinction between what was “necessary” and what was “extra.” I haven’t changed anything in this classification since I first set it up 20+ years ago, and I was wondering why my wealth manager and I couldn’t find common ground. A year ago, I completely redesigned my budget (the totals didn’t change, but everything else did :)), and at the end of the year, it ended up being very close to reality. I didn’t make any major changes, only some minor adjustments, and I consider this result to be one of my best achievements of 2025.

Professional

Many years ago, when I first told Boris what I wanted to do when I retired, he told me it was not a retirement but a change of profession. Although I still have at least a couple of years until retirement, I feel like my profession has partially changed, or rather, I have added something new to it. Speaking strictly about my technical expertise, I am extremely happy that in 2025, I learned new techniques and technologies and became better at what I have already been doing very well. I have been presented with several major technical challenges, and I have resolved them in a new way, not relying solely on my previous experience. I consider it a very important achievement, because that’s what keeps me at the top of my profession, but at the same time, I know I could do more. There are several areas that I have never touched before because “it was not my thing,” but I believe that the time has come to broaden my expertise and not to be solely focused on the areas I am already good at. I have a list of techniques and tools I want to learn in 2026, and I hope it comes true.

For the first time since I started at my current job, I was able to create new open-source projects. My current job does not leave me much time to pursue professional projects outside the job itself, but this year I added one new project and almost added another. Formally speaking, I added it yesterday, but the work was done in Q4 of 2025.

Prairie Postgres

This is part of my volunteer work, but it is so massive that it warrants a separate section. Obviously, that’s the first time in my life of running a not-for-profit, and I still think I had more fails than successes. The level of responsibilities was no less than in my “normal” job, and I was not fully prepared for that. For much of the year, I felt like a complete failure because I didn’t have time to do everything this “other job” demanded of me. My accomplishment is that I was not a complete failure after all; we survived, and we are slowly growing.

The rest of the volunteering

I am not completely happy about it. Firstly, I now strongly believe I took on too many responsibilities, and I am glad I had the sense to drop the Howard-Evanston community board, not without hesitation. But I still have too much, and all my volunteer positions were because I wanted them, not because someone forced me to take them. That was the first year I had more than one professional volunteer responsibility, and they have all been very time-consuming from the start. I know that I do not fulfill my volunteer obligations at least for two organizations, and I need to figure out how to change it.

It’s still a mixed bag with the Night Ministry. I know that I am doing at least something good, and I know that at least some people are thankful, but it has been a very challenging environment during the last year. Several times I thought that I was doing so little there that it would be better to stop coming altogether, but each time, I feel that I would create a void in my heart.

I am happier with Clinic escort volunteering, because of the early morning shifts – I finally figured out how to be useful regularly!

To be continued

It’s Still Just The Beginning Of The Year

Spending the first day of the year sitting at home and crossing off overdue tasks from my list was not the most exciting thing, though it did bring some satisfaction. But I had lots of hopes for January 2. It was the first workday of the year, and the weather was supposed to be great (and it was). I went to the office not because I had to, but because I had ambitious plans.

My plan was to go skating after lunch, then, after work, to go to the Chicago Architectural Center to finally see two already-not-so-new exhibits, and then go to the Siskel Center to see Mistress Disspeller. All of the above activities belonged to the category “I want to do this, but I chronically have no time for it.”

Skating became problematic since last season, when Millennium Park cut the skating season short. Instead of having the skating rink operating until mid-March, they close it on February 9, and this year, the last day will be February 1. Since I will be out of the country from January 16 to 29th, I have only two weeks left! And you can’t go skating when it’s raining or when it’s really cold, which limits the options even further. All of the above was a long explanation of why I headed to the skating rink on Friday. I knew it could be a mistake, because it would still be a winter break day, which would mean a big crowd, but the reality surpassed my wildest expectations.

When I arrived four minutes before the start of the session, expecting to show my pass on my phone and put on the skates, I saw a line circling half the rink, and I was told it was for those who had already purchased tickets online! I wanted to turn around and go back to the office, but the sun was shining, the weather was perfect, and I had already paid for a session, so I decided to stay. It took me ten minutes to check in, and when I finally put the skates on, there was barely any space left on the rink. I think there were actually these hypothetical one hundred people there! And at least a third of them couldn’t or almost couldn’t skate.

I made an effort :). I navigated around the people who were moving rather erratically, but after twenty minutes, I gave up.

While this portion of my plan could be considered at least a partial success, the other two failed completely.

I checked the CAC schedule on their website the day before, and the schedule said they are open until 7 PM both Friday and Saturday. I thought that finally, I would go there not to purchase a gift, but to see exhibits. When I arrived at five minutes to five, I saw several people standing puzzled by the CAC door, and when I came closed, I saw a sign, which said that there are “winter hours” in effect, and the Center will be only open until 4 PM on the days it will be open (and it will be closed Tue-Wed, but that was not important at the moment). I felt crushed and decided that I could comfort myself by having dinner at Lea’s Cafe instead of eating a vegan sandwich from work, which was in my backpack.

Lea’s Cafe didn’t fail me :). It was a perfect comfort food, and I even took half a baguette home, because it was a lot.

But after that, there was a huge disappointment at the Siskel Center. I read about this documentary, and it looked interesting, so I was looking forward to seeing it, but it was nothing like what I thought. I honestly could not figure out what the idea behind it was, and how people could act the way they did. It is possible that, at least in part, it was a language and cultural problem combined. The documentary was in Mandarin with English subtitles, and the melody of the language is very different from any other languages I know or know how they sound. I was reading the subtitles, and could not map the words to the emotions projected on the screen. It felt rushed; maybe Mandarin words are too short for translation, I don’t know. Or maybe, it was something wrong with me. At some point, I thought of leaving, but then decided to stay to the end and see whether something would change my mind.

I hope that this day of disappointment won’t represent the rest of 2026, and that my delights won’t be solely culinary!

The Beginning Of 2026

On December 31, I was working. Even though I worked from home, it was a pretty intense workday. I was hoping to start early and finish early, and make a nice meal to bring to my mom to celebrate the New Year with her, but “early” didn’t happen.

Most times, Igor is around for this early celebration, and then he brings my mom to my place, but since he went to celebrate with Anna’s family (which is definitely more fun), I figured I can’t/don’t want to make a trip to my mom’s house twice, and decided to make it simple and bring all the food to her place.

I prepared myself to sit and nod to everything she would say, which is the only way to keep things calm these days, and that’s exactly how it went. The events and facts she does and does not remember anymore are pretty random. Somehow, many people believe that when older people forget things, they forget the most recent events and remember their past really well. I don’t know what to tell you about others, but that’s definitely not the case with my mom. If there is anything she remembers, it’s repetitive things that she does every day. As for the past, even when she thinks she remembers some events, in reality, she does not remember them clearly, and I can see a difference between how she described them ten years ago and now.

It’s really sad to see, and I can imagine who scared she should be feeling that the world around her is becoming an unknown and dangerous place.

I didn’t plan to go to the Chicago River for the fireworks; not because Igor was not here; I am perfectly fine to go anywhere on my own. It was relatively cold, and also, I had too many things I needed to do before next Monday. On my way back from Armenia, I was making plans for the upcoming week (till January 5), and I was debating with myself whether I should do some fun activities, like going to the Navy Pier, or whether I should focus on catching up with life. By the end of the day December 31, the answer was clear!

I went to bed before midnight, and missed all the Happy New Year texts 🙂

On January first, it was even colder that on December 31, and also cloudy, which made it a perfect weather to be inside and focus on different aspects of community work. Also, I went to my mom one more time, to change her bedding and take her laundry to wash, and since I also took her shower curtain to wash, I returned one more time to put it back :).

The highlights of the day were several conversations with people with whom i do not talk often, and finally catching up on emails with friends, so I guess, the day was not entirely hopeless, and also, I finished some of my ong-overdue-tasks. Still, I hope that January 1 didn’t define the rest of 2026 :).

***

I thought my last week was “too much,” but this week was even worse because of several major incidents at work. Once again, it’s not like I work long hours, but how I work. During these two weeks, I had to pack a lot into each minute of my workday, and then, there were also multiple non-work urgent matters.

I ordered several new devices, which were on my list for a while, but I didn’t want to upgrade anything before my trip, so I ordered a bunch a day before my departure. And just to give you a picture of my overload: I received a new laptop on November 5, but it was not until November 13 that I opened it, and not until this morning that I migrated my previous Mac to the new one.

My previous was Mac Air, and it was super light. I consciously switched back to Mac Pro, but I already slightly regret it because it’s way heavier, even though it has almost the same dimensions.

A funny thing happened with my iPhone. I am on an Apple upgrade program, so I had to return my old phone back to Apple when I received a new one. When I took my old iPhone out of it’s case, I saw that it’s back was massively cracked. I dropped in multiple times, but I never had a need to take the case off, and the screen was fine. I still packed it for return, and was anxiously waiting for a note from Apple about how much they will charge me for repair. Miraculously, the repair cost was only $31, so now I am a happy owner of iPhone 17 🙂

I also got a new smart scale, and same story, I had to wait for the weekend to switch to it, because I couldn’t find twenty extra minutes in the morning to connect the new device to my account and to run the firmware update.

Things are finally sorted now, and I think I am done with new devices for some time 🙂

My old and new macs talking to each other 🙂

I Am Back

Back to Chicago, that resists. Back to my Lake. Back to being busy, getting up at 4:30 AM, and having a whole week of after-work activities.

Each time I am returning back from Finland, I promise myself to get six hours of sleep every night, and each time, it does not last for more than two days. I suspect, it will be the case again this time.

Recently, I read in one of the articles about aging, how important is it to get enough sleep, and that if you think that you need less than eigh hours, you are fooling yourself, and you should make an effort ti sleep longer, and that there is no such a thing as too much sleep.

For me, it defeats the whole point of living longer: I want to live longer, so that I can get more out of life, more experiences, more impressions. What’s the use of a long life if I would spend a bigger portion of it sleeping?!

The End Of Work-Life Balance?

As everyone knows, I love the co-working space Valo, and all the staff know me and go out of their way to do the best for me. Back in January, a funny thing happened, and since then, I use it as an excuse to get out of work by 5 PM or 5:30 at the latest when I am in Helsinki. Otherwise, I am caught in things that are just starting to happen in the office when people start their work day in Chicago.

Last week, when I started to reserve rooms for the upcoming work week, I accidentally reserved two rooms for October 28 instead of One for 28th and one for 29th, and when I realized I made a mistake, I couldn’t cancel either of these reservations. When I came to Valo on Monday, I asked Jarko, a person who is responsible for all tech support, and who helped me many times before, to move this second reservation from Tuesday to Wednesday. He told me I should be able to do it myself, and showed me in the app how to proceed. I was able to cancel, and make a new reservation for October 29, but unfortunately, there were no rooms with extended display available, and I really need this second display for work.

I mentioned it to Jarko when I was in the co-worker’s lounge for my next cup of coffee on Tuesday, and I told him I will check the next morning whether there will be more rooms available. He replied that even if there won’t be any rooms, he should be able to bring an additional display to my room, and asked me whether I was going to come around 8:30. I told him that sometimes, I come earlier and work out before I start the working day, and that was it.

On Wednesday morning, I checked whether to room for the day was already assigned, and I saw that it was. The room number was 328, so when I came in, I dropped my stuff in the room, changed into gym clothes and went to the gym, being pretty happy with the fact that the room as assigned early, so I had time for a workout, and breakfast with no rush, and then I could check with Jarko the monitor situation.

After my workout, I came back to room 328, and my key was not opening it – it flashed red! I looked and the app on the phone and saw that the room number had changed, and now I had room 284 instead of 328, and it was a room with external display. I realized what happened, and went down to reception hoping to ask them to open theold room and letting me to take my stuff. They said that Jarko has changed my reservation, but then he realized that I was already in so he switched it back.

I knew that nothing was switched, so I went to see Jarko (all in my gym clothes, mind you). he was very apologetic, but I told him everything was great, and I am very thankful for his thoughtfullnes, I just need to get my stuff out :). He went to the third floor together with me, helped me to pick up everything and move it to the new room. After the move was completed, he asked: would you like me to extend your hours today? We usually do not rent the rooms with extended display for the evenings, but I want to make sure! I said: thank you, no need today, but in general – I might need it. He replied: any time!

… I didn’t share his response with my Chicago co-workers 😀

Meeting With Friends

During the past week, I had chances to catch up with three friends with whom I hadn’t met in person for several months. And, to a different degree, I can say the same thing about each of these meetings: the changes that started to happen in me and with me during the past year, and especially during the past six months, are more significant than any changes ever happened in my life.

I started to notice it in late spring: for years, there were friends with whom I could always “start from the place we left last time,” as if we didn’t speak for months and years, and it’s not the case anymore. If people follow me on social media, they at least have some ideas about how my life changed, and how my priorities changed. But otherwise, I do not know how to start a conversation.

When we met with my friend Maryann who knows me almost since the time I came to the US, she asked: so, what’s new with you? What happened since we last talked in spring? I took a deep breath and replied: tell me what’s new with you first!

I do not know where to start, how to say that yes, there is work, and there is family, all generations of it, and travels, but that’s not the most important part of my life. It’s especially difficult, because the things I am doing belong to a very narrow professional niche, and you can’t quickly explain “what is Postgres.”🤷🏻‍♀️

All The Things I Worry About

I was very happy on Sunday, when I returned to Chicago: it was so warm! I went for a long bike ride, and then to the market, and then to the beach, and then we all gathered to celebrate Igor’s birthday.

And then, the reality hit. There were several unexpected things at work (I can’t go into details here, but I expected something to be done while I was away, and it was not, so I could not keep my promise to the customer to finish something else, and it was all extremely stressful).

Next, all things in Chicago that are going wrong: I learned about the exhibit of power in the Loop over the weekend, and about multiple horrible things that happened, and about the new threat from Trump to go to war with Chicago (and I am still paralyzed with uncertainty).

And then, another set of troubles with Prairie Postgres registration. As it turned out, the Charitable Bureau sent us a letter on September 11, and this letter got lost. I am glad I figured out that was the case, but now we need to pay the late registration fee and submit a whole bunch of new paperwork along with all the “old” ones.

I am very close to saying it’s too much for me to handle, which makes me feel even worse because other people around me have more serious problems to solve.

On the brighter side, my almost three-week-long case with Eventzilla tech support was finally resolved. Things are not working perfectly, but at least I figured out the workaround, and I am now able to send registration links to people, so I am grateful for that.

I hope to get at least some of these issues resolved, if not tomorrow, then by the end of the week.

Prioritization

If someone thinks I was relatively quiet in the past couple of days, that was true. The work was fine, but I had a sort of writer’s block with my tutorial, and I started to worry whether I would be able to finish it on time, with all my other responsibilities. One of the things that really bothered me was that I knew that for a workshop of that duration, I needed 100 slides. Also, I knew that even though some of the slides in my presentation were still placeholders, I had already put out there everything I wanted to cover. And when I mentally reviewed my tutorial, I felt strongly that I already had enough material.

I had several industrial slides that required a lot of time for research, but still, there was not enough, and I knew that I shouldn’t expand this part of my tutorial.

Tonight, I was finally able to overcome my writer’s block. I finished all the industrial slides, and when I moved to the next section of my presentation, I realized that there were several placeholders that should have been replaced with three slides each, not one! Finally, I had 94 slides, and I am sure that the remaining ones are somewhere there:).

Finally, I am producing the slides at a normal speed, and I should be able to (mostly) finish everything over the weekend.

And yes, about prioritization! With all being said

  • I covered an early morning escorting shift before work
  • I didn’t go to the Art Institute after work
  • I stopped at Osco for a couple of on-sale items
  • And I went to the beach at seven. The lifeguards were out, the air was cool, and the water was warmer than the air, and I knew that the swimming season was about to end!

And also, our conference website is live! But I will showcase it tomorrow 🙂