This list was published a couple of weeks ago (see here), and out of these one hundred books, I read only two and heard about four more, which sounds like a miserable outcome. I am not sure there are that many people who would be able to read a hundred books in a year, and they do not have to be from the must-read list, but still. I feel like in the previous years, more titles sounded familiar.

I would be curious to know how many books from this list other people read.

Recently, I returned or deleted several books in my audio library that were bought impulsively or by mistake. When I started listening to them, I soon realized I didn’t want to continue. That being said when I started to listen to Happiness Falls, I thought that this book would end up in the same virtual dumpster. To my surprise, I realized that I wanted to keep reading! Moreover, I used each and every single free minute to keep listening until I finished the book. 

I was especially surprised that I ended up liking it so much because one of the main themes of the book resonates with the central theme of Everything is f*cted, the book which I didn’t like at all. The idea is that happiness is relative, and the higher the “base level,” the more difficult it is to reach a high level of happiness. Sure, the objective measuring of happiness is a separate issue, but at least subjectively, many (if not most) people agree. 

I do not like this idea because, for many years, inspired by my mom’s attitude, I was always super anxious for this very reason. When I wanted something to happen, or I was anticipating something good coming/happening soon, I tried to lower my expectations so that I wouldn’t be disappointed. This way of thinking evolved quickly into experiencing severe anxiety before these potentially good events. I imagined all sorts of things that would prevent good things from happening. Likewise, I was never fully immersed in being happy, always thinking that “there will be consequences.” 

It took years after I moved to the US (which meant being away from my mom and also observing a very different attitude to life) until I started to realize that I was harming both myself and my loved ones and that I started to learn to think and live differently. It took a while, but I made this change, possibly because, by nature, I am a happy person, and I was a happy child until I was taught to be unhappy. 

The most important thing I loved about this book is another theme: reflections about how a non-verbal person is judged in our society as mentally incapable. The author draws a parallel between being a foreigner who does not know the language of their new country and a person with motor skills deficiencies that prevent them from using spoken language. 

Language (and accent)-wise, I’ve written about it so often that I do not want to repeat it. I had it both ways: being a subject of “those who speak with an accent think with an accent” and subconsciously having the same attitude toward others. I am deeply ashamed of the latter, but I can’t deny that I had that attitude at some point in my life. 

Also, I couldn’t stop thinking about one Russian family whom I have known for many years, where the mother discovered a similar way to communicate with her son with severe cerebral palsy. I remember both her struggles and disbelief and denial from the doctors and general public, all the accusations of “faking” her son’s communications with others. I could not stop thinking about them all the time I was listening to this book. 

Once again, I didn’t blog about the books I read during the past month, so it’s the long list again!

Madame Restell: The Life, Death, and Resurrection of Old New York’s Most Fabulous, Fearless, and Infamous Abortionist

What an amazing book! What an amazing woman! Sure, I knew the name of Madame Restell before, and I would see her mentioned in many historical accounts and petty much in any book or article about abortion rights. Still, this book was an eye-opener.
I saw this book in the list of library recommendations for March – Women’s History Month. And I thought how strange it was that even when you are very much pro-choice, you still feel awkward calling an infamous abortionist “an outstanding woman.” The truth is, though, that Madame Restell was an outstanding woman indeed.
I find it remarkable that she was able to build her family wealth by providing much-needed services (doing something that she was really good in). She had very strong opinions and never tried to hide them. She knew that she was doing the right thing for people who sought her services and lived in accordance with her principles, so she felt like a very “complete” person. It would be a big achievement even nowadays to make a good life doing what you believe in and what you are good at.
Lots of details about her life make me think about her as a twenty-first-century woman rather than a ninetieth century. She was a primary breadwinner for her family (and still stayed married!). She dressed in the latest fashions when she was “an old woman” by mid-nineteenth-century standards. She accepted challenges. She was herself, no matter what the circumstances were. And for that, she should be remembered.

Poverty. By America

A very good book, but as it often happens, the anticipations were too high. I mean, it’s always refreshing to hear a simple fact that we should focus on eradicating poverty rather than on helping poor people to overcome poverty. What I would like to see thee would be more precise references to the research which analyzes the impact of minimal basic income, links between single motherhood and income, and alike.

The Journal of the Plague Year

Not so well know book by Daniel Defoe, which, same as Robinson Crusoe, is a fictional diary of a person leaving through the Great Plaue of London 1665. Obviously, it’s very interesting to compare “now” and “then” pandemics, actions of authorities and ordinary people behavior.

Bois Akunin’s Yama

Huge disappointment a=on all accounts.

Akunin’s Outstanding People of Ancient Rus

As expected – very “unpolished” facts about the early years of Russian history.

I have time to listen to audiobooks, and sometimes, I even have time to read books on Kindle, but I have no time to write reviews or at least to rate the books I read on Goodreads. Today (because I am extremely nervous for more than one reason), I finally recorded my last two-and-a-half months’ reading list.

Aquarium by Victor Suvorov – the only book I read in Russian for a long while. It was one on this “how could you possibly not have read it,” so I did, and it left me with a sort of “what was the point of this?” reaction. To be fair, recently, at least half of the books I read prompted this reaction. I don’t know what’s wrong with me.

Attention Span: a very different book, but I had a similar reaction. I was listening to it and nodding: OK, OK, I get it, now what?… and then no conclusion, no new ideas…

I‘m Glad My Mom Died: I liked this book; it is very sincere and talks about situations and feelings which are not talked about that often. A couple of months ago, I listened to the last minutes of David Sedaris’s interview. Answering the question about his father and his relationships with him, Sedaris said: why can’t we say bad things about those who passed away? If he was a bad person, why I can’t say this? Well, maybe I will follow his lead sometime.

The next three books came from the Chicago Public Library list for Women’s Month.

Daughters of Victory: just a very bad book. I don’t know what else to say about it. I am surprised by how the author collected so much information about that period of Russian history and still did it all wrong! Like people didn’t talk this way, didn’t behave this way, didn’t think this way! The picture does not come together.

The Book Woman’s Daughter: not super-exciting, but good reading (and when I started reading, I thought that “blue people” are imaginary and just presented racial discrimination).

The Exceptions: Nancy Hopkins, MIT, and the Fight for Women in Science: I really liked that one! I didn’t know about the women mentioned in the book. I didn’t know about the magnitude of gender discrimination in academia (and so recently!). A true eye-opener.

Clean Code: in case you saw this book in my Goodreads feed and wondered that in the world was that, it was given to the whole IT team with the intention of initiating discussion about the code quality. I am planning to review it in my professional blog.

Despite not having time for anything (or maybe because I still need something to switch my attention to), I recently listened to more audiobooks than usual. However, I am often left in a state of dissatisfaction. I do not know whether something is wrong with me or if I am following the wrong recommendations, but I do not know how to rate most books I have read recently. In many cases, the books didn’t meet my expectations, as with The Other Wes Moore, The Feminist City, and Gentrification is Inevitable. Each time I just started to get into the complexity of an issue, the book would end with no conclusion. Most likely, it’s me expecting the answer where there is none.

The situation is a little bit different with two books I just finished. One of them was Anxious People, which I picked up after an attempt of cashless bank robbery close to our office, and started to read on the long flight without an internet connection. The other one was There is no such thing as an easy job which was suggested for our book club discussion but didn’t make a cut. With both of these books, I feel the same way: I should like them; they are very insightful, with lots of unexpected twists, others like them, and I should like them too, but somehow, they are not “my” books. 

I am going to leave it this way for now 🙂