Category: everyday life

Mid-Week

Somehow, it is difficult to plan for anything after my return from Prague. Logically, I understand that there should not be any life-threatening with Anna, and if I can plan my trip to Prague, I can plan things after. But I am stuck on uncertainty. Also, there will be not even a day of vacation between now and the end of the year (excluding the state holidays), still I feel that I am going to be out of the office to such an extent that I can’t take any time of fin January.

***

On Tuesday, I was at the Beetlejuice show with my neighbor. No, I did not see a movie. Yes, I knew what it was going to be about. And I was willing to give it a try. And I didn’t like it:). And that’s fine, but … there were three young women behind us (no, not teens!). And they were screaming so loud!!!! All the time! My Apple Watch started panicking and showed me dangerous decibel levels,l so each time they started to scream, I had to cover my ears! My neighbor said that the woman behind her was kicking her chair from the back all the time!

***

I was barely home this week, and it’s already late and I didn’t write three important emails I was supposed to write last weekend.

A Week In Review

Once again, way too many things going on, and oftentimes, no time for a short reply to somebody’s email…

This post is a random collection of small things that happened last week; too small for separate blogs but still worth mentioning for this reason or the other…

  • The first time since I owned AirTags, I used it to find a missing object – the house keys, which fell out of my pocket when I hurried up to cross Sheridan before the light turned red. I only noticed it when I was approaching my home, but the FInd Me app showed a bold blue arrow leading to the place where I dropped them, and I quickly returned and found them.
  • Making dinner in the Youth shelter. I asked J. whether he was OK with peeling potatoes. He: I love peeling potatoes! I do it every Thanksgiving at home. I mean, I did it before I was kicked out…
  • Another exchange in the shelter. S.: I hate Florida! That’s where I was called n*** for the first time.
  • I remember when I made pumpkin pie for the first time, I used milk instead of the heavy cream and declared that “it turned just fine.” On Saturday, I made it with heavy cream. What can I say?!… the same as with Georgian Apple Cake – you can’t cheat when baking! If it’s heavy cream, then heavy cream it is! Makes a world of difference!
  • I took two pairs of boots for repair instead of throwing them away and buying new ones. Aside from the fact that I really liked one of these two pairs, my primary diver was a desire to minimize waste, so I am quite proud of myself!
  • I bought all my Secret Santa presents.
  • We made progress with the Pg Conf EU slides, so I almost stopped panicking.
  • I finally scheduled a plumber and had four annoying things fixed. All four were in my small shower, and it would take me several hours to fix them (although, technically speaking, I could fix them all). That’s something that was totally worth delegating!
  • The weather is so gorgeous, I do not know whom I should thank for it!

Assassins At Theo

The week is almost over, but it feels like it was just yesterday: I went to Theo to see a performance of Assassins with my long-time friend who is very much into musical theater.

That was a perfect outing for us! The first time I saw a show at Theo, I loved it but realized I wanted to be at the table. Then, I subscribed for a table sitting, and it was awesome. This time, I added a ticket for my friend and dinner for both of us. I didn’t want to add a dinner just of myself, and I was not sure whether I wanted to spend an extra hour and a half in the theater before the performance. With my friend, however, everything was just perfect!

We both liked the food, and we had enough time for a long conversation, and she liked the show, and she liked the whole cabaret idea (and I liked it, too!).

Today, I was finally able to find a show clip, which I am happy to post.

And here is more reading about the musical. It is running for five more weeks! (And I just can’t believe I am so fortunate to have several amazing theaters so close to home)

“Happiness Falls” – A Book review

Recently, I returned or deleted several books in my audio library that were bought impulsively or by mistake. When I started listening to them, I soon realized I didn’t want to continue. That being said when I started to listen to Happiness Falls, I thought that this book would end up in the same virtual dumpster. To my surprise, I realized that I wanted to keep reading! Moreover, I used each and every single free minute to keep listening until I finished the book. 

I was especially surprised that I ended up liking it so much because one of the main themes of the book resonates with the central theme of Everything is f*cted, the book which I didn’t like at all. The idea is that happiness is relative, and the higher the “base level,” the more difficult it is to reach a high level of happiness. Sure, the objective measuring of happiness is a separate issue, but at least subjectively, many (if not most) people agree. 

I do not like this idea because, for many years, inspired by my mom’s attitude, I was always super anxious for this very reason. When I wanted something to happen, or I was anticipating something good coming/happening soon, I tried to lower my expectations so that I wouldn’t be disappointed. This way of thinking evolved quickly into experiencing severe anxiety before these potentially good events. I imagined all sorts of things that would prevent good things from happening. Likewise, I was never fully immersed in being happy, always thinking that “there will be consequences.” 

It took years after I moved to the US (which meant being away from my mom and also observing a very different attitude to life) until I started to realize that I was harming both myself and my loved ones and that I started to learn to think and live differently. It took a while, but I made this change, possibly because, by nature, I am a happy person, and I was a happy child until I was taught to be unhappy. 

The most important thing I loved about this book is another theme: reflections about how a non-verbal person is judged in our society as mentally incapable. The author draws a parallel between being a foreigner who does not know the language of their new country and a person with motor skills deficiencies that prevent them from using spoken language. 

Language (and accent)-wise, I’ve written about it so often that I do not want to repeat it. I had it both ways: being a subject of “those who speak with an accent think with an accent” and subconsciously having the same attitude toward others. I am deeply ashamed of the latter, but I can’t deny that I had that attitude at some point in my life. 

Also, I couldn’t stop thinking about one Russian family whom I have known for many years, where the mother discovered a similar way to communicate with her son with severe cerebral palsy. I remember both her struggles and disbelief and denial from the doctors and general public, all the accusations of “faking” her son’s communications with others. I could not stop thinking about them all the time I was listening to this book. 

What I Liked About My Night Out

Same as my last weekend, I liked that I didn’t have to rush through the evening. My workdays are such that I am completely focused on what I am doing, and I often need to literally solve several problems in parallel. I love the excitement of chasing the problem and fixing it, and I also like these intense sessions of design when you go through several solutions, try one, go through code building, find design flaws, discard and start over. However, this leaves you completely drained even if you do not work long hours.

I like to fit a lot in my day, but it also takes an ingenuity to take a day (or night) as it goes, having an agenda, but not necessarily a timeline.

The last weekend was good, and the week that followed was also good, but now I am facing a challenge of making it through the rest of the year without a crisis.

Halloween For Myself

That was one of the few days for a very long time when I didn’t have any obligations after work: no volunteering, no visits to my mom, and nothing urgent to write about. And I had plans just for myself. The plan was:

  • Finally, visit the newly reopened Pret on Monroe

I should mention that Halloween was the coldest day of this fall so far. It was freeing and it was snowing for the good part of the day:

From the office window

However, by the end of the workday, the snow stopped and the sun came out:

  • After Pret, I walked towards the Starbucks Reserve Roastery on North Michigan Avenue. I rarely walk in this direction these days, and I enjoyed every minute of that walk.
Continue reading “Halloween For Myself” →

No Title…

My friend from Saint Petersburg told me this horror story. She was talking to her friend in Germany on her landline (there is some huge discount on landline calls from Germany, as she explained). Since it was almost free for her friend, they talked for a long time – over forty minutes. While they were still talking, she heard the buzzer from downstairs: Open, police!

Frightened, she buzzed them in, and two policemen in full gear entered her apartment. They asked her whom she was talking to, and whether she was sure it was her friend, not a scummer, and what city she was calling from. They said that they “wanted to protect her” from possible scum(?!). All looked like they came to arrest my friend, and it took her a while to talk them into leaving her alone.

Later, she started to question her other friends, and it turned out that others had similar situations (all conversations were on landlines and calls coming from Germany).

I don’t know what else to add…

The Earliest Christmas Present Ever:)

Jarvis Family Full Moon Fest

We had a family activities day at Jarvis Square on Saturday. It was the first time we had such a family-style celebration (the adult part followed after 8 PM). There was free face painting, and free s’mores, and trick-or-treating, and drumming, and Taro fortune telling. Most importantly, there were kids in costumes who had enormous fun! I walked there with my mom, and we walked around and made our s’mores over the fire, and then I got the butternut latte in the Charmer’s Cafe for myself and caramel cider for mom, and we sat there and watched the kids running around with the buckets, sitting for the face painting and drumming.

Mom was saying that it’s too bad we can’t take pictures, and then she added that it’s impossible to tell others how good it was because no words and no pictures can reflect the feeling and the atmosphere. That was one of the rare moments when she felt the way I hoped she would feel after moving here.

We saw Channel 5, and one kid yelled: Mom, we are on the news! The reported was interviewing one of the organizers, and I heard that she said that “it feels very safe,” which I couldn’t agree more.

The Great Lake

While I was going through the pictures I took yesterday, I thought again about how much positive energy my Fort Sheridan trip gave me. I feel that I can make it through this week :). And the best thing at Fort Sheridan is undoubtedly the Lake. Seeing the Lake in a forest preserve is very different from seeing it chained in steel and granite. When I approach Lake Michigan from the forest or the prairie, I feel its wild greatness even more. I do not have the proper words to describe it:)

I ended up returning to the train station in between trains, and I didn’t feel like waiting for an hour and forty minutes, so I called Uber. When we were almost at my place (turning into Sheridan from Birchwood) the driver saw what was on the horizon and said: oh, you live so close to the sea! I replied: thank you! Thank you for calling it a sea!