Author: Hettie D.

My name is Henrietta (Hettie) Dombrovskaya. I was born in Saint-Petersburg, Russian (actually, back then – Leningrad, USSR) in 1963, and immigrated to the United States in 1996. I love Saint Petersburg, the city I was born and raised in, and I think it’s one of the most beautiful places in the world. Similarly (but differently) I love Chicago, and can’t imagine myself moving somewhere else in the observable future. I have three children, Igor, Vlad and Anna, all adults living on their own, and one (so far) granddaughter Nadia. I also believe that my children are the best thing that happened in my life. As for my professional life, I am working in the field of Information Technologies. When I was twenty, I’ve declared that the databases are the coolest thing invented and that I want to do them for the rest of my life. Thirty plus years later, I still believe it’s true, and still, believe that the databases are the best. These two statements together imply that I think a person can have it all, and indeed, I think so! Keep reading my journals to find out how I did it.

Mom

The week before last was quite challenging on the “mom’s front.” She forgot again that since the start of the war, we haven’t congratulated her on V-Day. And to be honest, no matter how many times I tell myself that it does not really matter, that she is where she is mentally and can’t reason straight, I still can’t create a version of the “Goodbye Lenin” movie. I can’t make myself think that “it doesn’t matter.” I can’t make myself to say anything celebratory. We talked about this two years ago. A year ago. She kept bringing it up again this year, and I ended up raising my voice and being upset, and the latter one was completely unnecessary.

The WWII Veterans’ organization organized a concert and a celebration at a restaurant, and my mom was invited to both. Later, she told me that at one of the events, another veteran asked her whether she had a social worker. When my mom replied that she didn’t have one, they kept asking who did shopping for her and who cooked and cleaned. She proudly replied that she was doing all of it by herself.

I remember how excited I was when I learned that I could get a social worker for her and offload some of my responsibilities. And I remember how upset she became when I told her that this could be an option. I see at least two different aspects here.

Continue reading “Mom” →

Fort Sheridan In May

Even in May, you can still see that Fort Sheridan is further to the North than Rogers Park – although everything is green, the prairie flowers are just starting to bloom, and in most cases, I can only guess what is about to bloom in a couple of weeks.

… And More Summer!

May 15 Reset (WBEZ newsletter) started with the following paragraph:

As a Chicagoan, taking a summer vacation is risky. You might enjoy yourself in Michigan or California or somewhere else, but is it worth missing a time when Chicago shines? 

And that’s exactly how I feel – each summer!!!

… And Other Signs Of Summer!

I can do long bike rides on weekdays before work!
Blooming peonies by the train station
Sweet Home Gelato is open!
The fountains on the River Walk are operating
Nothing to do with summer I just wanted to brag. We had Chef’s avocado toasts last Wednesday, and we could choose as many toppings as we wanted (yes, including caviar)

The First Summer Accord

Of course, I mean going to the beach for the first time!

It was beach weather last weekend, but I didn’t have time to go, and today, although I had many different things on my list, I found an hour to spend lying down on the beach and listening to the waves.

The water was still cold, and although I walked into it, I did not want to immerse myself in it. It was after 6 PM, and the warmest part of the day was already over. Still, I was at the beach, by the lake. And as it always happens when I am at the beach, I was doing absolutely nothing. I didn’t bring anything to read with me. I didn’t even look at my phone. I was there at that moment, and that was the best thing.

On the way home, I looked at the weather forecast on my phone. I already knew that Sunday’s weather was going to be cooler, but I saw that it would be in the eighties again on Monday. I thought that if I went to work a little bit earlier and returned a little bit earlier, I would be able to spend an hour on the beach (and still visit Mom and do yoga). OMG, how blessed I am to live ten minutes from the Lake! And I have the whole summer ahead of me! 

I returned home and smelled the smell of warm weather on my body, the smell of skin touched by the sun. The sweet fatigue of being out in the warm weather and finally coming back inside. The cool floor under my bare feet. All of it distinctly and unmistakably joined in one happy cord: it’s summer! Summer! Summer!

Educational

Igor’s recent article discusses a now-high school principal who is a former immigrant student. As such, Julie Lam experienced firsthand the difficulties of navigating the American school system and is forever grateful to educators who helped her along the way.

A couple of days after Igor sent me his article, I caught the ending of an episode on BBC, where they talked about Finnish schools and Finland’s leadership in education. One statement specifically caught my attention. They said that if we compare the highest students’ achievements in Finland and the rest of the world, there is no significant difference. What is different is the average student’s achievement level.

Here is why I think these two are related. I often observe that recent (and not so recent) Russian immigrants, as well as immigrants from other authoritarian countries, judge American education based on the level of difficulty of the school courses offered to gifted students (because all of their kids are obviously gifted). I haven’t heard this kind of opinion for a while, but there are a lot of such parents in my current company. I hear a lot of conversations that are very critical of American education in general and Chicago Public Schools in particular, to the extent that “if they will close the selective enrollment schools, we are moving out of here.” Many of my co-workers enroll their children in the private school so that “they could have a proper education.”

I would be the last person to say that CPS does not have any problems. However, the American school system, with all its deficiencies and varieties that are sometimes difficult to grasp, is incredible. I want to say that it is a great equalizer, but there is much more than that. No other institution in this country is close to “equal opportunities for all.” Even schools that are severely underfunded teach their students important civic values, collaboration, and acceptance.

American schools make American citizens. Good American schools make good American citizens. People who scream, “Why do I have to pay taxes to fund schools that are not good enough for my children” are the same people who are upset with homeless people sleeping in their parking lots, panhandlers on the street corners, and unruly teenagers breaking the shop windows. And why don’t they see any connection?

My audience is slowly but surely becoming more diverse…

May Chicago PUG

Summer

I know it’s not summer yet, and no matter what your views on that subject are, the earliest you can think about the start of summer is the Memorial Day weekend. Still, I tend to think that Mother’s Day marks the turn of the seasons. Before Mother’s Day, the 50s feel “warm,” and after Mother’s Day, the 50s feel “cold.”

It was beach weather on Mother’s Day, and after that, a couple of days of cooler weather felt like “give me my summer back!”

TIME Magazine: Ways to stay hydrated if you hate drinking water

This article is for me! I am one of those people who hate drinking water, and I do not know what is so bad about not drinking it! I am perfectly fine with my coffee, tea, and fruits :), so I do not think I will try al this methodology they suggest, but – who knows!

Continue reading “TIME Magazine: Ways to stay hydrated if you hate drinking water” →

TIME Magazine: How to talk about weight loss

Very good article, I have nothing to add.

Continue reading “TIME Magazine: How to talk about weight loss” →