On family history, parenting, education, social issues and more
Author: Hettie D.
My name is Henrietta (Hettie) Dombrovskaya. I was born in Saint-Petersburg, Russian (actually, back then – Leningrad, USSR) in 1963, and immigrated to the United States in 1996.
I love Saint Petersburg, the city I was born and raised in, and I think it’s one of the most beautiful places in the world. Similarly (but differently) I love Chicago, and can’t imagine myself moving somewhere else in the observable future.
I have three children, Igor, Vlad and Anna, all adults living on their own, and one (so far) granddaughter Nadia. I also believe that my children are the best thing that happened in my life.
As for my professional life, I am working in the field of Information Technologies. When I was twenty, I’ve declared that the databases are the coolest thing invented and that I want to do them for the rest of my life. Thirty plus years later, I still believe it’s true, and still, believe that the databases are the best. These two statements together imply that I think a person can have it all, and indeed, I think so! Keep reading my journals to find out how I did it.
This is the best musical I ever saw in my life. Seriously. I tried to find some recordings on the web, and only found this one, and it conveys very little of how marvelous this performance is! Everything: the voices, the acting, the costumes, the set – everyting was superb.
The performance was very long – more than three hours, but I didn’t feel tired a bit. My neighbor and I both sat with our eyes wide opened throught the whole show, trying to catch each smallest detail.
I don’t know what else to say except of that I want to see it again (and I have no time for that :))
I entered the Cook County building for early voting. When I reached the elevators to the sixth floor, I saw a middle-aged black woman and a middle-aged white man approaching the same elevators from the other side. When the elevator came down, the man moved aside to let us in first, saying, “there is still some chivalry here.”
We reached the sixth floor, and he let us out first, holding the door. When we entered the registration room, the black lady said: why won’t you go first? You hold the door for us. He replied: “There is still some chivalry here. Ladies first.” I survived that and didn’t comment; instead, I smiled and said, “thank you.” Then we filled in our forms and gave them to the clerk. The clerk checked them one by one. She asked the black lady whether she knew how to use the machine. She didn’t ask the middle-aged white guy. And then she asked me.
My friend Lena started a tradition of visiting me in sprig to attend the Chicago Botanic Garden Orchid Show. We did the first one right before the pandemic lockdown, then we did the second one last spring, right after the war in Ukraine started. And last Sunday, we went to the 2023 Orchid Show. Same as before, we took my mom along, and Lena’s friend from Palatine came to join us.
I do not think anybody needs words to describe the orchids. They are magical. This year, the show organizers placed magnifying lenses close to some of the orchids, and neither Lena nor I liked this. We both think, it was a good try but the result was not as magical as one could imagine.
A rare occasion that my first look at BBC alerts in the morning made me smile – I saw the news about Biden’s surprise visit to Kyev. Actually, I instantly felt completely awake! It was quite awesome and unexpected.
But even though several of my friends messaged me excitedly, I told all of them that Biden does not decide the aid to Ukraine solely. We still need to make sure that the US Congress will continue to support financial and military aid for Ukraine.
That brings me right to the main topic of this week. I was trying to find any rally supporting Ukraine, and the only one announced was the one on February 24 by Saints Volodimir and Olha Cathedral.
Why is it not enough? First, this rally will be mostly Ukrainian; there will probably be some representatives of Polish, Lithuanian, and maybe Georgian communities. And it will be far from the Loop. And the important thing now is not only to condemn the war and war criminals but also to send a clear message to our legislators.
Here is what struck me. I didn’t build a political activists network in Rogers Park yet. I emailed a few people from NWSOFA with whom I canvassed and rallied in the suburbs before I moved, and there was zero enthusiasm about rallying for Ukraine. One of them suggested contacting Jan Schakowsky’s office. I went to her website, and to my dismay, I saw zero about Ukraine. Zero. Nothing in her list of issues or in her foreign policy stands. I could not believe my eyes.
My concern is that now that we have a Republican majority in Congress and the conversation about “how long we are going to send money to Ukraine” has resumed, the message from the constituents should be unambiguous. We should support Ukrainians in their fight because they defend the world. It’s not a charity, and it’s not an investment. It is the fight for all of us. Without help from the rest of the world, Ukraine won’t win. And if Ukraine doesn’t win, Putin won’t stop.
Igor joined the efforts of the organizers of Saturday’s rally on Daley plaza, and I am trying to do my small part by promoting this event. I don’t know how many people will come, but we have five more days, so I hope to spread the word.
If you are in Chicago, you might have seen these flyers. Please come and join us on Saturday at Daley Plaza.
Joffrey Ballet put on a new “Anna Karenina” production with an all-new score by Ilya Demutsky, which is stunning. I spend almost an hour searching for the best photos, and they can only remotely reveal what a stunning production it is. There is very little of Tolstoy left. For example, the best part is the scene of Anna and Vronsky’s intimacy, which is 100% against Tolstoy’s beliefs. If you remember this part of the novel, he does not describe the scene, he just said that “it happened.” And then, he describes all the horrible feelings of “murder” and how Anna is disgusted with what just happened. This goes with Tolstoy’s idea that sex is sinful and “unnatural” and ruins the love, not compliments it. All the nonsense that people with a strong desire often say since they feel guilty about how they feel.
Anyway, is erotic scene is so beautiful and so powerful!
On February 15, we had one more live meetup of the Chicago PostgreSQL User Group. I am very happy with how it went, except for one thing. Positive things first, the attendance was at the pre-pandemic level first time after the pandemic! I would even say it was on the higher side of pre-pandemic attendance. The speaker was outstanding (would you ever expect less from Kirk Roybal?) There were a lot of questions during the talk and after the talk, and some people stayed after 8 PM. All of this was great, and I think that how a good meetup should look like, and that’s why we have live meetups. However, there was one thing that I didn’t like. Look at the picture below:
I asked the audience how many people had female coworkers. At least two-thirds raised their hands. And then I asked: so where are they? Why didn’t…
Yesterday, I was browsing my Russian social media feed. I am not doing it consistently, but there are still several people about whom I care deeply. lthough they read this blog using Google translate, if they post something, it will be in Russian, ad that’s a primary reason I check this feed periodically.
Unfortunately, no matter how hard you try, you can’t perfectly filter your feed (which might not be so bad because this way, you do not lose touch with reality). Anyway, I am going through the feed, and I see a repost from “somebody” who is anti-aggression – antu-putin-glory-to-Ukraine et al., and they publish a satire about Putin looking for his “historical roots” while visiting Africa. It is extremely difficult for me to describe this piece, but I have to, so please forgive me.
This satire goes to the effect that he feels at home with African tribe chiefs, and he strips himself naked and puts a ring in his nose, and dances with them around the bonfire, and now he has a legit right to eat human flesh, and that’s where his real place is. I was sick to my stomach by the time I finished reading, and jumped to the comments.I started to type something about “how you can insult African nations in such a way, but then I realized that the reader would take it as a joke! I looked through all the comments which were posted by that time, and there was not a single one noticing how wrong this whole thing is! All comments were like: That’s excellent, perfect, yes, that’s the right place for him! And nobody, NOBODY….
Flexible theatre memberships always look appealing because you think you will just choose the day which works best for you when it is closer to the show. And then, since a show is not on your calendar, you forget that you must choose.
This happened to me with my Whenever Goodman membership: the play “the ripple, the wave which carries me home” looked very interesting, but I thought, “I will look at it next week, this week is too busy,” until all of a sudden, I received an email saying that the show must close the upcoming Sunday.
Fortunately for me, I opened this email before Sunday, and luckily, Igor and I found one show time that worked for both of us.
We were almost late for the show because we went out for dinner and got very engaged in our conversation, so when we rushed into the Owen theater five minutes before the show started, and ended up sitting close to the extended family of the actress who played a leading role!
It is surprising how many people are unaware of the history of pool segregation and how many horrible things were happening fairly recently. Even the author of the play admits in the interview that she was not aware of many of them before she started working on this play. For me, the show’s most shocking moment was when the main heroine’s mother talks about three boys, two black and one white, who were killed (she does not give details of what happened, except “out of four only one returned”), and she says about their funerals:” They should have been buried together, but no cemetery would do this.”
I am glad we got a chance to go. This is one of the plays which is almost too close to reality, and although there are a lot of funny moments, it is very tragic, and very close to ho
Oh, how much I loved this movie! I am so glad I made a non-existent time in my schedule to watch it! Once again, thanks for 400 Theater being so close to us and running all the new releases. Funny thing – for the first time ever, I used a senior discount:).
I just can’t get over it – what a great movie! I liked everything about it!
For those who have known me long enough and heard me saying, “I want to do one more startup before I retire,” quite often, the title of this post would be at least unexpected. And I won’t swear by it. My life had taken so many unpredictable twists that the only thing I learned very well was “never say never.”
However, recently, I was saying something different: “I hope to stay with this company until I retire.” And once again, I won’t swear by it because life is unpredictable, but I started thinking about what changed my mind so drastically. It is not only that I enjoy working with everybody in this company (I was fortunate to have wonderful co-workers everywhere I worked), but most of the problems I have to solve here.
A startup’s appeal is that you come to uncharted territory and build everything from scratch. There is…
Hettie's Reflections 